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I found out 1 week into my marriage that my husband has been looking at and contacting other women. He swears that he never cheated nor met up with anyone. I am so devastated because it is completely out of character. We dated for 4 years before getting married and lived together for 3 years. I accidentally stumbled onto his "secret" email address one week after our wedding. I never would have married him if I had known this information before. I feel trapped now. We have agreed to counseling and I hope that helps. He promised me that he would never hurt me again, however, he is STILL looking at other woman online (2 months later). I never had a problem with porn (I thought it was natural) but now I feel that it will only result in an eventual affair. I want to do everything possible to save my marriage while being realistic about our future. The internet has made infidelity so much easier, much easier than actually working on a relationship and that is what scares me. I appreciate any advice :)
 

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I caught my husband looking up escort services. It went away and over time I thought it was behind me. Now 25 years later, he leaves me, devastates me and guess what? Of course.....

I think it's worse than an affair because there is nothing accidental, is totally intentional. And for someone who can make that kind of intentional decision, must be thinking bout it a lot and making intentional decisions.

Deal breaker for me.
 

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I never had a problem with porn (I thought it was natural) but now I feel that it will only result in an eventual affair. I want to do everything possible to save my marriage while being realistic about our future.
No eventual about it, this is an affair in the heart and needs to be treated as such. Since you want to stay, you need to insist on total transparency along with his promise to cease and desist in any extra-marital activity. Google dr harley and marriage builders where you can find some excellent advice on recovering from infidelity, which is what this is.
 

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Trust is absolutely everything in a relationship, and if you really can't trust him not to begin an affair with one of these women he's contacting then I think you should call it quits.
 
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