Here's my backstory:
My h of 4 years made me leave our house in May and sent me to go stay with family members a few states away. (He really did force me out as he had complete control over me during most of our marriage -- partly my fault, i know). He said we needed to take a few weeks, he just needed some time, etc. Point is, I figured I'd be gone a couple weeks max.
About a month later, with almost zero contact in between (he needed space, remember?), he calls and tells me he's filed for D, has packed up all of my things and shipped them to where I was staying. Refused counseling, wouldn't answer my questions or even have a discussion. Except to throw in that he loves me, always has and always will. :rofl: We had never discussed divorce before and I was blindsided.
In short, he pulled the rug out from under me while I was out of town and never talked to me again (This is pertinent for later).
He filed in the state of his legal residence (State A) -- his job allows him to list his legal residence anywhere in the US for tax purposes -- but neither of us actually live there and never have together. The state where I'm a resident (State B) -- and the one where he actually lives -- has alimony and spousal support laws. State A does not. He lied on the paperwork about my state of residency.
Here's the deal now:
Though there's no alimony, State A is a community property state meaning I would be legally entitled to half of what was acquired during the marriage. I didn't work full-time while we were married (I got laid off shortly after our wedding and his job required us to be transient); he was the breadwinner.
Given that I didn't earn the money, and it was a relatively short marriage, am I greedy to ask for what the law says I'm entitled to? I only want to be able to rebuild my life. My h is, shall we say, thrifty. He's hiding assets now and did during our marriage. He claims we acquired basically nothing for the three years we were married. We weren't rich by any means, but he does very well. The settlement proposal he's offered is a joke. My lawyer was dismayed.
I am not bitter and not after revenge even though he turned my life upside down. Rather, I am struggling with guilt because I wasn't the one who made the money. What is typical for shorter marriages without children?
Thanks.
My h of 4 years made me leave our house in May and sent me to go stay with family members a few states away. (He really did force me out as he had complete control over me during most of our marriage -- partly my fault, i know). He said we needed to take a few weeks, he just needed some time, etc. Point is, I figured I'd be gone a couple weeks max.
About a month later, with almost zero contact in between (he needed space, remember?), he calls and tells me he's filed for D, has packed up all of my things and shipped them to where I was staying. Refused counseling, wouldn't answer my questions or even have a discussion. Except to throw in that he loves me, always has and always will. :rofl: We had never discussed divorce before and I was blindsided.
In short, he pulled the rug out from under me while I was out of town and never talked to me again (This is pertinent for later).
He filed in the state of his legal residence (State A) -- his job allows him to list his legal residence anywhere in the US for tax purposes -- but neither of us actually live there and never have together. The state where I'm a resident (State B) -- and the one where he actually lives -- has alimony and spousal support laws. State A does not. He lied on the paperwork about my state of residency.
Here's the deal now:
Though there's no alimony, State A is a community property state meaning I would be legally entitled to half of what was acquired during the marriage. I didn't work full-time while we were married (I got laid off shortly after our wedding and his job required us to be transient); he was the breadwinner.
Given that I didn't earn the money, and it was a relatively short marriage, am I greedy to ask for what the law says I'm entitled to? I only want to be able to rebuild my life. My h is, shall we say, thrifty. He's hiding assets now and did during our marriage. He claims we acquired basically nothing for the three years we were married. We weren't rich by any means, but he does very well. The settlement proposal he's offered is a joke. My lawyer was dismayed.
I am not bitter and not after revenge even though he turned my life upside down. Rather, I am struggling with guilt because I wasn't the one who made the money. What is typical for shorter marriages without children?
Thanks.