Here it goes. I've been married for just over 20 years. We have three kids, two in college one still in HS. I thought we had a good marriage, usual ups and downs but overall very good. Kids were/are very happy well adjusted. Money is def. not an issue for us. No debt or financial problems. We did have a lot go on this year. Finished building new house in spring, sold old house (pretty stressful), middle child graduated HS and left for college, etc...So basically the WS just comes home from work one day packs her bags and says "I'm leaving!". We were all like what the heck are you talking about??? She said she was not in love with me anymore and had been planning it for a year!! Even the kids were in shock. She left and didn't care that she left her kids!! The kids won't even talk to her they are very angry. So I've been following the forums and they are very helpful. About three weeks into it I did confirm that she was havin an affair with some random guy she met at a bar!!! we don't even drink or keep booze in the house. As soon as I found out I filed for D. I packed the rest of her clothes (in trash bags) and told her to pick them up. Here we are 2 months out and I don't even know who this lady is. i def. won't reconcile after PA, just want to know what to expect next?? She doesn't even realize or care about the pain she has caused everybody. WHO IS THIS LADY???