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Discussion Starter #1
Long story short: I've slept with more men than my husband has women, however, I was never a 'loose' girl that somehow my husband seems to think I was.

I've never cheated on my husband- not even a long glance at another man...NOTHING!

He was full aware of my 'number' and the circumstances by which it has become what it is when we first met; We've been together now for three years.

But within the last couple of months, he sometimes refuses to touch me in bed, or during sex completely stops and tells me to go away...he begs for 'naughty' sex, but when I fulfill this he becomes sick and discouraged.

I honestly feel as though he could tell me some ridiculous sex story he was a part of and it wouldn't make a difference, but I can't so much as mention an ex without being called names or without him sulking...

It's become such a problem now, I've practically given him a hall pass to fix his number...but nothing seems to have helped.

Any advice?
 

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Have talked about why he is feeling this way? Why all of a sudden?

Would he agree to counseling ?
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I can relate to this. I was a virgin with my last girlfriend and she was not. She had 1 other partner before me. To me i felt cheated, judged, and never #1 to her. I know you werent his first... Then i had sex with another girl in revenge (didnt cheat) but it wasnt the same. I had sex with her out or revenge when my girlfriend had sex with another dude out of lust. I thought my girl was the most gorgeous girl in the WOLRD. And me having sex with another girl doesnt compare. We were now both at 2 partners... But i had never lusted after another girl. Thats what hurt me, so even if he has sex with another woman, it wont change anything. He would do it out of anger not lust, and he wants to have sex out of lust. To me, looking back at my relationship, i know its weird but i think it bothered me so much cause i loved her so much.
 

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Wait...........he calls you names? What are the names? What do you mean by a hall pass? Irregardless of whatever your husband's problem is, it is NOT justification nor does he have the right to disrespect you.

2nd, this is not your fault, he knew you had a past. This is mainly his issue, although you both are going to have to work on it together.
 

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What you did prior to meeting your husband is none of his damn business to throw at you now. You already told him, he married you knowing what he knew and he has zero right to now toss it in your face. Total crap.
Giving him a hall pass is even worse. A hall pass to do what? Cheat on the marriage because his ego is so fragile that he can't deal with it and then blames you for his being this way.
I'd give some serious consideration if you want to continue to stay with someone who is mentally abusing you and making you feel bad for things you did prior to meeting him. Tell him to polish his halo, hop down from his ivory tower and grow a pair. Holy hell.
 

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I can relate to this. I was a virgin with my last girlfriend and she was not. She had 1 other partner before me. To me i felt cheated, judged, and never #1 to her. I know you werent his first... Then i had sex with another girl in revenge (didnt cheat) but it wasnt the same. I had sex with her out or revenge when my girlfriend had sex with another dude out of lust. I thought my girl was the most gorgeous girl in the WOLRD. And me having sex with another girl doesnt compare. We were now both at 2 partners... But i had never lusted after another girl. Thats what hurt me, so even if he has sex with another woman, it wont change anything. He would do it out of anger not lust, and he wants to have sex out of lust. To me, looking back at my relationship, i know its weird but i think it bothered me so much cause i loved her so much.
You are pissed because she had sex with someone else PRIOR to meeting you and you say it bothered you so much because of your love for her?
How about this, if you loved her so much as you claim, you wouldn't judge her for something she did prior to being in your life. She didn't do anything wrong. Nothing.
You on the other hand......
 

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I can relate to this. I was a virgin with my last girlfriend and she was not. She had 1 other partner before me. To me i felt cheated, judged, and never #1 to her. I know you werent his first... Then i had sex with another girl in revenge (didnt cheat) but it wasnt the same. I had sex with her out or revenge when my girlfriend had sex with another dude out of lust. I thought my girl was the most gorgeous girl in the WOLRD. And me having sex with another girl doesnt compare. We were now both at 2 partners... But i had never lusted after another girl. Thats what hurt me, so even if he has sex with another woman, it wont change anything. He would do it out of anger not lust, and he wants to have sex out of lust. To me, looking back at my relationship, i know its weird but i think it bothered me so much cause i loved her so much.
You are the problem here, not your g/f. You need to grow up and mature and live in the real world. It's highly unlikely that you are going to find yourself a virgin.

As someone else said, feeling like that ain't love. It's childish and jealousy that will suck you dry. You need to grow the hell up and be an adult. Are you 13??? :mad:
 

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You should have married a man not a little boy.

This is his problem and I would`t even entertain it as if it had an iota of validity.

Deal with it.
 

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You are the problem here, not your g/f. You need to grow up and mature and live in the real world. It's highly unlikely that you are going to find yourself a virgin.

As someone else said, feeling like that ain't love. It's childish and jealousy that will suck you dry. You need to grow the hell up and be an adult. Are you 13??? :mad:
But hey, she's so much worse because she DARED to have sex PRIOR to meeting him. He is so much better because he used another woman for sex and all is okay with his moral compass because it was revenge and not lust.
People like him should be forced to wear a sign. Him and Hush's husband. It's about control and mental abuse disguised as love because these individuals are so insecure that they have to take down the other with them to their pit of hell and in the process make someone feel guilty for something they have no reason on Earth to feel guilty for.

:pissed:
 

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No matter what, the name-calling is abuse, as is the withholding behavior.

So he was fine with this up until 3 months ago? Or did it just escalate to this point?
 

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Discussion Starter #11
It came about because i told him i slept with a man with a bigger penis than his. And ive slept with twice as many men as he has women.. In a much shorter time period.
 

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He feels that because he only had sex with women he was in long relationships with that its different.. I dont think I should feel bad for being carefree. I had a few one night stands.. and i dated a lot. But all that should matter is now correct?
 

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He feels that because he only had sex with women he was in long relationships with that its different.. I dont think I should feel bad for being carefree. I had a few one night stands.. and i dated a lot. But all that should matter is now correct?
Correct.
 
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He feels that because he only had sex with women he was in long relationships with that its different.. I dont think I should feel bad for being carefree. I had a few one night stands.. and i dated a lot. But all that should matter is now correct?
He knew all about your past and no, he doesn't have the right to abuse you now because of it.
He also doesn't have the right to define his sexual past as somehow being "better" than your sexual past because he was in a relationship.
Please tell the good Reverand to step down from the pulpit and grow up. You might also tell him that there was a guy here with the same issue waxing on and on about how much "better" he was than his ex and we all warned him to just stop it but did he listen? No. His wife left him because she got tired of being made to feel guilty for her past....a past long before she met him and a past that he was fully aware of when he married her.
 

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He feels that because he only had sex with women he was in long relationships with that its different..
Andd who gives a f if you did? He knew all this when he married you right? And now he wants to act like the ruler of the universe and mistreat you because he's insecure? How pathetic. Don't tolerate him talking down to you or treating you poorly. If he keeps up these antics you need to decide if you want to be with a man who acts like a petulant child. He sounds very immature. Brighteyes...your post is spot on. Guys and women alike who behave this way are ridiculous.
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Discussion Starter #16
Well hes more mature than you all whom do nothing but name call yourselves... Youre abusing him. Hows it any different? Who's mature? and whos isnt? Hes not that rude.. he just wants to be alone and to not be touched.. he has issues with his fathers recent death and the fact that he was once very overweight.. lost all the weight.. but still has a reminder of extra skin.. and no i just recently told him that i slept with a larger man.
 

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Well hes more mature than you all whom do nothing but name call yourselves... Youre abusing him. Hows it any different? Who's mature? and whos isnt? Hes not that rude.. he just wants to be alone and to not be touched.. he has issues with his fathers recent death and the fact that he was once very overweight.. lost all the weight.. but still has a reminder of extra skin.. and no i just recently told him that i slept with a larger man.
Huh? Okay then, no more help needed. I wish you well.
 

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Discussion Starter #20
well unfortunatley i dont think ill need one... He knows hes being inmature and hates it.. and knows theres no cure.. ne delete button so he says.. I believe hes planning on leaving me.
 
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