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466 Posts
What's it mean to "re-write history"?
It's when the WWS decides to focus on all negative things and pretend it was never good. For instance, you spouse may have, like mine, bragged to EVERYONE about how great their partner was, etc. THEN, in the midst of all this b/s we're going through, acts like none of it was good. Or says some was good but mostly bad.
They do this to justify actions and decisions they're doing now. LIke cheating, leaving, etc.
However, this thread is to focus on the TRUTHS that may lie within.
We all know we're not perfect. So. I'd like to have this as an admittance group thread. I'm trying to work on myself by admitting what I feel I've done wrong, and we can discuss each other's wrongs... along with what we think would correct them for the future.
1. I didn't put my wife #1 all the time.
2. I allowed us to get into the rut of every day life. Granted we were building a business (haunted house so seasonal) and we agreed we'd have to work work work and play very very little. So we both knew attention giving etc would be at an all time low. So this made things worse.
3. I belittled her sometimes. Said things I regretted very much later. Like I'd get upset or poke fun at how goofy she'd act sometimes. Asked her for better etiquette while eating. Sometimes she'd pile a huge fork full and shove it in, while at a $40 plate restaurant.
4. Anger issues. Sometimes yelled or hit a wall. Use to be VERY bad about 3 years ago. But have been VERY calm since then. INcluding road rage.
5. Anal sex. I'd ask for it from time to time. Knowing she didn't want to, but sometimes she'd be open to a lot of things and thought I may get her to try.
6. Didn't help out around the house a lot. Sometimes I'd not do dishes or w/e and let her do all the laundry. She works too. Also, going to family's house sometimes I would forget to help her with the clothes and bags. My deal was, I like to go in first, mingle a bit, THEN go out and get the stuff.... I never thought to help her first, NOR would I suggest leaving the stuff for a few minutes.
That's all I got right now. I'll come back and tackle each one of mine after while and tell how I've fixed, or plan on fixing my issues.
Feel free to share your faults in your relationship. I'd like to have a good discussion on things. We may not find other's faults to be that bad of an issue, and vice versa.
It's when the WWS decides to focus on all negative things and pretend it was never good. For instance, you spouse may have, like mine, bragged to EVERYONE about how great their partner was, etc. THEN, in the midst of all this b/s we're going through, acts like none of it was good. Or says some was good but mostly bad.
They do this to justify actions and decisions they're doing now. LIke cheating, leaving, etc.
However, this thread is to focus on the TRUTHS that may lie within.
We all know we're not perfect. So. I'd like to have this as an admittance group thread. I'm trying to work on myself by admitting what I feel I've done wrong, and we can discuss each other's wrongs... along with what we think would correct them for the future.
1. I didn't put my wife #1 all the time.
2. I allowed us to get into the rut of every day life. Granted we were building a business (haunted house so seasonal) and we agreed we'd have to work work work and play very very little. So we both knew attention giving etc would be at an all time low. So this made things worse.
3. I belittled her sometimes. Said things I regretted very much later. Like I'd get upset or poke fun at how goofy she'd act sometimes. Asked her for better etiquette while eating. Sometimes she'd pile a huge fork full and shove it in, while at a $40 plate restaurant.
4. Anger issues. Sometimes yelled or hit a wall. Use to be VERY bad about 3 years ago. But have been VERY calm since then. INcluding road rage.
5. Anal sex. I'd ask for it from time to time. Knowing she didn't want to, but sometimes she'd be open to a lot of things and thought I may get her to try.
6. Didn't help out around the house a lot. Sometimes I'd not do dishes or w/e and let her do all the laundry. She works too. Also, going to family's house sometimes I would forget to help her with the clothes and bags. My deal was, I like to go in first, mingle a bit, THEN go out and get the stuff.... I never thought to help her first, NOR would I suggest leaving the stuff for a few minutes.
That's all I got right now. I'll come back and tackle each one of mine after while and tell how I've fixed, or plan on fixing my issues.
Feel free to share your faults in your relationship. I'd like to have a good discussion on things. We may not find other's faults to be that bad of an issue, and vice versa.