Ok here goes, I've been lurking for a while and need to get an honest opinion.
this all started in the middle of September. My wife owns a small antiques business and as you can imagine is in contact with tons of individuals on a daily basis. I have access to her email account and once in a while will pop on her IPAD and check it out. I don't usually tell her but she's not hiding it either. In mid September she gets a e-mail from one of her clients who needs to pick something up and ends with maybe I can take you out to dinner after. My wife replies with a thank you that's very nice of you but I'm married. OK things are cool my stomach is fine and we move on a week.
Guys send another e-mail looking forward to antique show blah,
blah blah hope to see you there. My wife replies and says yes she will be there have a great day. Now this starts to be a daily occurance and my wife is responding to the comments. Please note that these are very run of the mill notes going back and forth...but I'm starting to get a little nervous as every time he sends a note he gets some type of response.
I read the forums so now I need to get a little more information so I go over to our cell phone records to check. I know the guy is from another town and different area code and find his number. At this point nothing serious is happening and he leaves two different e-mails which are harmlous that she doesn't respond to. Back to feeling OK. Then I looking at the phone detail and see that she calls him, the next thing I know there starting to text, I look at a couple of them on her phone and agian they look harmless but my wife might respond with a smiley face, not her style.
An important point to make at this point in the story is she never tells me about the e-mails going back and forth or ever mentions this guys name. Which in most cases she would discuss clients with me...she knows I can be jealous.
Move forward and they start texting a little more but it's maybe a string of 6 or 10 not 100 a day or an hour phone call,.but when the guys contacts her she will always respond. I also notice that in her e-mail there was a long string between the two that I could read but one day she deletes them all. No her usual method of operation. Some of the e-mails he sends end with sweet dreams or had so much fun seeing you today...but while my wife does respond there is nothing in her reponses I would get upset with. However at this point I'm very upset and am having trouble sleeping or concentrating at work. What I'm most upset with is that a couple of times she called him. So another week goes by and agian they might text back and forth or a call will be made but I can't see the detail but know that I'm pissed off.
I have all the e-mails and detail on the phone and she comes home from work one night and I confront her. I have to come clean it wasn't in a calm manner and she listens and explians that yes he is a client and they have been talking. She understands my concerns and comes clean that the guy did ask her out without me exposing that information. She says that if you feel uncomfortable I will stop contacting him. Fast forward two weeks only one email from him which takes my wife 3 or 4 days to respond to and nothing else.
My wife is not great at discussing feelings and I want to get into more detail about it, she says there is really nothing to discuss she was trying to build up new business and the guy was going to spend money.
Can anyone explain what this is. A wife using her skills to drum up business or is this how emotional affairs start.
Second I'm still pissed about this and it looks to me she has moved on. Agian for all the snooping I'm doing including phone and E-mail it looks like no contact. I have written her a long e-mail explaining the reasons why I'm upset but haven't sent it to her...should I
this all started in the middle of September. My wife owns a small antiques business and as you can imagine is in contact with tons of individuals on a daily basis. I have access to her email account and once in a while will pop on her IPAD and check it out. I don't usually tell her but she's not hiding it either. In mid September she gets a e-mail from one of her clients who needs to pick something up and ends with maybe I can take you out to dinner after. My wife replies with a thank you that's very nice of you but I'm married. OK things are cool my stomach is fine and we move on a week.
Guys send another e-mail looking forward to antique show blah,
blah blah hope to see you there. My wife replies and says yes she will be there have a great day. Now this starts to be a daily occurance and my wife is responding to the comments. Please note that these are very run of the mill notes going back and forth...but I'm starting to get a little nervous as every time he sends a note he gets some type of response.
I read the forums so now I need to get a little more information so I go over to our cell phone records to check. I know the guy is from another town and different area code and find his number. At this point nothing serious is happening and he leaves two different e-mails which are harmlous that she doesn't respond to. Back to feeling OK. Then I looking at the phone detail and see that she calls him, the next thing I know there starting to text, I look at a couple of them on her phone and agian they look harmless but my wife might respond with a smiley face, not her style.
An important point to make at this point in the story is she never tells me about the e-mails going back and forth or ever mentions this guys name. Which in most cases she would discuss clients with me...she knows I can be jealous.
Move forward and they start texting a little more but it's maybe a string of 6 or 10 not 100 a day or an hour phone call,.but when the guys contacts her she will always respond. I also notice that in her e-mail there was a long string between the two that I could read but one day she deletes them all. No her usual method of operation. Some of the e-mails he sends end with sweet dreams or had so much fun seeing you today...but while my wife does respond there is nothing in her reponses I would get upset with. However at this point I'm very upset and am having trouble sleeping or concentrating at work. What I'm most upset with is that a couple of times she called him. So another week goes by and agian they might text back and forth or a call will be made but I can't see the detail but know that I'm pissed off.
I have all the e-mails and detail on the phone and she comes home from work one night and I confront her. I have to come clean it wasn't in a calm manner and she listens and explians that yes he is a client and they have been talking. She understands my concerns and comes clean that the guy did ask her out without me exposing that information. She says that if you feel uncomfortable I will stop contacting him. Fast forward two weeks only one email from him which takes my wife 3 or 4 days to respond to and nothing else.
My wife is not great at discussing feelings and I want to get into more detail about it, she says there is really nothing to discuss she was trying to build up new business and the guy was going to spend money.
Can anyone explain what this is. A wife using her skills to drum up business or is this how emotional affairs start.
Second I'm still pissed about this and it looks to me she has moved on. Agian for all the snooping I'm doing including phone and E-mail it looks like no contact. I have written her a long e-mail explaining the reasons why I'm upset but haven't sent it to her...should I