[minimalME]

Good. Save some for the rest of us!

I thought you were married?

 

[Enigma32]

I thought you were married?

I am. Just joking around with @RandomDude

 

[DownButNotOut]

Might be controversial opinion but I'm going to say it anyways. I'm not one of those who thinks the older men are predators in these types of relationships. I actually think it's the young women that are the predators. They understand what they are getting themselves into.

What actually bothers me is the stupidity of some of these old guys who believe these young women are with them for anything other than their resources. They don't bother to ask themselves "if I wasn't providing the expensive dates/gifts/travel or paying her rent/car/bills, would she continue to date me?"

These guys should be using the women in every way possible and make sure to get their monies worth out of them because the women are parasitic and 98% would go find a different host if the guy couldn't provide.

See, this is what bothers me.

If the young women are predators finessing older men out of their money, and I agree with that.

Then it follows that the older men are victims. But are they viewed as victims? Nope. They are shamed and blamed. Just like your second paragraph. A man finesses women that way and they make a Netflix special about it and the guy goes to jail. But when men are the victims, they are attacked worse than the tinder swindler.

hehe. This whole thread jack reminds me of an old joke:
Man: Would you sleep with me for a million dollars
Woman: Sure!
Man: How about for a dollar
Woman: No! What kind of girl do you think I am?!
Man: We established what kind of girl you are, now we're just haggling over price.

First rule of sugaring: Don't pretend it is more than it is.

 

[RandomDude]

Good. Save some for the rest of us!

Haha I've had my slice of the cake 😅 😝

 

[Lila]

Then it follows that the older men are victims. But are they viewed as victims? Nope. They are shamed and blamed. Just like your second paragraph. A man finesses women that way and they make a Netflix special about it and the guy goes to jail. But when men are the victims, they are attacked worse than the tinder swindler.

Nope you missed where I specifically called out the old men who see these types of relationships as anything more than transactional. They subconsciously or consciously fool themselves into thinking the young women are in love with them for more than their money. Thats the part that makes me want to slap them behind the head and yell "snap out of it".

I say kudos to the men that accept exactly why these young women are with them.

 

[motye51]

Hello,
I’m 35 years old and past my “prime years”. As a woman who’s getting older, I don’t feel attractive and desired by men. I think it’s normal since I don’t look 20 anymore.

The other day a college aged guy gave me a compliment on my hair. My hair wasn’t even all that great but I felt good, as it’s been long since I don’t receive compliments. There’s also another guy who is young. He’s the son of a female co worker and he hugs me when he says hi to me. It just seems that younger guys are more friendly than men around my age or older.

I’ve heard that young guys have fantasies about having sex with an older woman at least once in their lifetime. But why is it that older men don’t see women in their 30s, 40s and 50s attractive? Look, I get the whole biology thing. I know younger women are more attractive and fertile but I still don’t understand why an older woman is unnoticed.

Aren’t you attracted to maturity? We might not be a bombshell but we have our **** together at least. Also, a lot of 20 year olds still have baby faces and look like teens and I ask myself: “Why is a 40 year old attracted to a girl and not a woman?” I feel like older woman look more womanly and classy even in the way they dress. I know not all are attractive but the ones that stay fit and take care of themselves.

Men also complain that older women are bitter. I don’t think we become bitter on purpose and if you think about it, it makes sense that some of us become like that. Men get more attractive with age so they don’t have to worry about becoming undesirable like us. How can we be enthusiastic about dating and life in general if society and MEN put younger women on a pedestal all the time? Some people even think at 30 a woman is already “too old”. Can you imagine how ****ty that is to a woman?

And last but not least, older women are more confident in bed, yet it still doesn’t do it for men. Only the younger men fantasize about older women while older men don’t look at us that much. Can you explain me why?? I just wish we were appreciated more by men our age or older.

I love your post and I'm goi ng to sit and watch as the explainations come in!!!! There probably won't be many I'll like...lol

 

[Big_Jim59]

I am over 60 and can tell you that older women just look like women to me now days. As for being attracted to them I save that for my wife.

 

[DonJuan]

Why would an older man want to date an older woman if he can get younger/hotter women with less baggage and less jaded?

Probably the older woman’s “hotter” attitude. Goes a long way.

 

[DonJuan]

As weird as it might seem. You have given your perception but here's reality.

It’s the marriage license I would avoid. Your marriage could be over in a week. Then you got to wait on someone’s signature to cheat (meet your needs I mean) or it’s considered cheating and revenge cheating. That signature could take 1-3 years. My divorce took 3 years.

 

[BigDaddyNY]

And that could be the case but this is kind of reinforced by the data that about a third of men under 30 are not having sex while the percentage of women in that range is much smaller, who are celibate.

I'm alarmed by both of these statistics.

If about 30+% of men under 30 are celibate and about 60+% of them are single, it's looking dismal out there and I'm convinced it isn't good for us as a civilization.

But historically, a lot more women have reproduced than men so maybe this is some cycle humans just repeat in some form or another.

I've seen some f these stats too.

For the 63% of men and 34% of women stat they defined single as neither married, living with a partner nor engaged in a committed relationship.

And in that same age group 30% of men have had no sex in the past year and 20% of women have had no sex in the past year. So I guess that says the other 33% of men that classify as single are getting at least one hookup in the last year.

It definitely seems that relationships and sex are concentrated in a smaller group of men and for woman it is more evenly shared.

 

[ConanHub]

It’s the marriage license I would avoid. Your marriage could be over in a week. Then you got to wait on someone’s signature to cheat (meet your needs I mean) or it’s considered cheating and revenge cheating. That signature could take 1-3 years. My divorce took 3 years.

I am for getting government out of marriage or vice versa but these are guys that aren't even trying to date.

 

[DonJuan]

I am for getting government out of marriage or vice versa but these are guys that aren't even trying to date.

Oh ok

 

[ConanHub]

I've seen some f these stats too.

For the 63% of men and 34% of women stat they defined single as neither married, living with a partner nor engaged in a committed relationship.

And in that same age group 30% of men have had no sex in the past year and 20% of women have had no sex in the past year. So I guess that says the other 33% of men that classify as single are getting at least one hookup in the last year.

It definitely seems that relationships and sex are concentrated in a smaller group of men and for woman it is more evenly shared.

Yup. A good number of women in that range are going older or sharing with other women, knowingly or not.

 

[DonJuan]

I am for getting government out of marriage or vice versa but these are guys that aren't even trying to date.

Would these guys be more the wealthy wanting a one stand kind maybe?

 

[DonJuan]

Hello,
I’m 35 years old and past my “prime years”. As a woman who’s getting older, I don’t feel attractive and desired by men. I think it’s normal since I don’t look 20 anymore.

The other day a college aged guy gave me a compliment on my hair. My hair wasn’t even all that great but I felt good, as it’s been long since I don’t receive compliments. There’s also another guy who is young. He’s the son of a female co worker and he hugs me when he says hi to me. It just seems that younger guys are more friendly than men around my age or older.

I’ve heard that young guys have fantasies about having sex with an older woman at least once in their lifetime. But why is it that older men don’t see women in their 30s, 40s and 50s attractive? Look, I get the whole biology thing. I know younger women are more attractive and fertile but I still don’t understand why an older woman is unnoticed.

Aren’t you attracted to maturity? We might not be a bombshell but we have our **** together at least. Also, a lot of 20 year olds still have baby faces and look like teens and I ask myself: “Why is a 40 year old attracted to a girl and not a woman?” I feel like older woman look more womanly and classy even in the way they dress. I know not all are attractive but the ones that stay fit and take care of themselves.

Men also complain that older women are bitter. I don’t think we become bitter on purpose and if you think about it, it makes sense that some of us become like that. Men get more attractive with age so they don’t have to worry about becoming undesirable like us. How can we be enthusiastic about dating and life in general if society and MEN put younger women on a pedestal all the time? Some people even think at 30 a woman is already “too old”. Can you imagine how ****ty that is to a woman?

And last but not least, older women are more confident in bed, yet it still doesn’t do it for men. Only the younger men fantasize about older women while older men don’t look at us that much. Can you explain me why?? I just wish we were appreciated more by men our age or older.

Because the older guy is likely to be attracted to attitude then looks, the younger guy is likely to be attracted more to looks then attitude.

 

[DonJuan]

Because the older guy is likely to be attracted to attitude then looks, the younger guy is likely to be attracted more to looks then attitude.

Then their $

 

[ConanHub]

Would these guys be more the wealthy wanting a one stand kind maybe?

Could you elaborate?

I think I know what you're saying but I want to be sure.

 

[DonJuan]

Could you elaborate?

I think I know what you're saying but I want to be sure.

Well, their probably working, have money but don’t want long term or short term relationships, just one night stands or hookers.

 

[Brothapocalypse]

This is the uncomfortable conversation mature modern women usually don't want to have. It's not always the age, but how well older women maintain themselves. What I find is that women go through this cycle of heartache and pain after hot girl summers in their 20s. They have 1 or more kids by 1 or more men, then most give up on their appearance in their mid 30s.

Fast forward a few years, they get lonely and want to get back out there one last time to find a man in their 40s or later. That's cool, but instead of hitting the gym, they just go straight to the big leagues, expecting a handsome man making figures to just wife them up as is lol.

No no no. You have to prepare yourselves first before thinking you have a shot at such a successful older gentlemen who has younger options coming at him. This is what older women tend to miss.

 

[Married but Happy]

Hello,
I’m 35 years old and past my “prime years”. As a woman who’s getting older, I don’t feel attractive and desired by men. I think it’s normal since I don’t look 20 anymore.

The other day a college aged guy gave me a compliment on my hair. My hair wasn’t even all that great but I felt good, as it’s been long since I don’t receive compliments. There’s also another guy who is young. He’s the son of a female co worker and he hugs me when he says hi to me. It just seems that younger guys are more friendly than men around my age or older.

I’ve heard that young guys have fantasies about having sex with an older woman at least once in their lifetime. But why is it that older men don’t see women in their 30s, 40s and 50s attractive? Look, I get the whole biology thing. I know younger women are more attractive and fertile but I still don’t understand why an older woman is unnoticed.

Aren’t you attracted to maturity? We might not be a bombshell but we have our **** together at least. Also, a lot of 20 year olds still have baby faces and look like teens and I ask myself: “Why is a 40 year old attracted to a girl and not a woman?” I feel like older woman look more womanly and classy even in the way they dress. I know not all are attractive but the ones that stay fit and take care of themselves.

Men also complain that older women are bitter. I don’t think we become bitter on purpose and if you think about it, it makes sense that some of us become like that. Men get more attractive with age so they don’t have to worry about becoming undesirable like us. How can we be enthusiastic about dating and life in general if society and MEN put younger women on a pedestal all the time? Some people even think at 30 a woman is already “too old”. Can you imagine how ****ty that is to a woman?

And last but not least, older women are more confident in bed, yet it still doesn’t do it for men. Only the younger men fantasize about older women while older men don’t look at us that much. Can you explain me why?? I just wish we were appreciated more by men our age or older.

There's a lot here to unpack. Personally, since I'm well past 50 (and even when I was in my early50s), I can say retrospectively that I certainly did find women in their 30s through 50s attractive, and now I find women in their 60s attractive. The attraction window moves forward with my age, apparently. Maybe that's not true for most men, but I don't know.

And yes, maturity is attractive, but NOT if it kills playfulness and spontaneity. Younger women tend to have that playfulness, but hard life experiences sometimes dulls it as people (women AND men) get older. Biologically, the fertility thing is real, and I think it's largely subconscious in men. Personally, once I was done having kids, fertility was a hugely negative factor. Of course, menopause (or its approach) can be a deterrent to attraction as many women lose libido (except for the last hurrah burst that nature may provide). I think many men want younger women because they worry that menopause will kill their sex life, so the farther off that is, the better; as we see here, loss of libido can easily occur LONG beforehand!! So, the closer a woman comes to menopause, perhaps the less attractive she becomes for that reason. Now, once she's through it, she either has a good libido or not, and once again those that do have libido will be more attractive than those who don't, but only dating them will determine which it is.