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andrewh hasn't posted since 2-17-19. I have a feeling he won't be back unless all hell breaks loose and he feels we can help him.
 

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It is usual for whom and to achieve what? It might temporarily make the BS feel better. Otherwise, it is hard to see what benefit it would have.
Saved my marriage ma’am.:wink2:
 

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Saved my marriage ma’am.:wink2:
That's the thing. For many people adultery is a deal breaker, but for some reconciliation is the goal. I think after putting heart and soul into a marriage, it can be very difficult to let go if there is a chance of working through things and saving the marriage.
 

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Saved my marriage ma’am.:wink2:
With all due respect, you scared off your wife's boyfriend not because she WANTED him gone, but because you wanted him gone.

And once you scared him off - again, not by HER choice - you basically took away her other option, leaving you as her ONLY option. That's when she suddenly chose YOU again and decided to reinvest in your marriage, pretty much by default.

Man, I don't see that as a 'win' at all. I'm sorry. :frown2:
 

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She keeps her phone on her at all times.
She is sleeping right now but its a fingerprint lock and I don't know her backup passcode.
Cheaters do that often.
Tell her your phone is dead and you need to borrow her phone.
If she denies, you know that she has something to hide.
 

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With all due respect, you scared off your wife's boyfriend not because she WANTED him gone, but because you wanted him gone.

And once you scared him off - again, not by HER choice - you basically took away her other option, leaving you as her ONLY option. That's when she suddenly chose YOU again and decided to reinvest in your marriage, pretty much by default.

Man, I don't see that as a 'win' at all. I'm sorry. :frown2:
Not to thread jack but SSGI, I left my wife for six weeks. She chased me down and begged me to reconsider. FWW caught hell from exposure to her family, my family, close friends and our kids. My daughter even called her mom names that are unrepeatable. There is more to the story than me getting in POSOM’s face.

COnfronting POSOM was a matter of honor for me. I am not programmed to be disrespected without standing my ground and standing up for me and what is right and what is not right. I remained calm with him but forceful. I am a pretty good sized individual and capable of doing considerable damage if desired, but I simply dressed him down with eloquent marine language. At the time I confronted I pretty much was headed to D. :smile2:If you only knew the entire story. But, oh well.
 

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The
With all due respect, you scared off your wife's boyfriend not because she WANTED him gone, but because you wanted him gone.

And once you scared him off - again, not by HER choice - you basically took away her other option, leaving you as her ONLY option. That's when she suddenly chose YOU again and decided to reinvest in your marriage, pretty much by default.

Man, I don't see that as a 'win' at all. I'm sorry. :frown2:

Like the saying goes:. Don't judge a book by its cover��


That is your " biased" perrception of his sitch. His wife got a very rude awakening. That awakening got her out of the idiotic fog most affair junkies are influenced by to commit stupidity after stupidity and hurt themselves the most in the end.
 

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Sometimes it is necessary to go scorched earth as General Sherman did on his march to Atlanta. I for one would make his life a living hell on earth. He who does not wish to be f’d With does not F’ over.
Poor analogy. I get the shock and awe part but Sherman was a documented psychopath that would have been jailed or committed had it not been for a military career peaking in attempted genocide.
 

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With all due respect, you scared off your wife's boyfriend not because she WANTED him gone, but because you wanted him gone.

And once you scared him off - again, not by HER choice - you basically took away her other option, leaving you as her ONLY option. That's when she suddenly chose YOU again and decided to reinvest in your marriage, pretty much by default.

Man, I don't see that as a 'win' at all. I'm sorry. :frown2:
Then you clearly have little experience with setting goals, achieving goals and the like?

He wanted OM gone and he got the OM gone. Which, to my mind, is a win.

You really don't have any understanding of what he wanted and what he achieved, do you? :scratchhead:

And I followed his story from its very beginning, as did many on TAM.

We saw him win. Pity you didn't see that.
 

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Then you clearly have little experience with setting goals, achieving goals and the like?

He wanted OM gone and he got the OM gone. Which, to my mind, is a win.

You really don't have any understanding of what he wanted and what he achieved, do you? :scratchhead:

And I followed his story from its very beginning, as did many on TAM.

We saw him win. Pity you didn't see that.
I don't see scaring the OW or OM away from your cheating spouse - who WANTS that person in their life - as a 'goal' or a 'win.' No need to pity me just because I see it differently. Sorry, but I see it as lowering ones self to having to force their cheating spouse to treat them the way they SHOULD have been being treated all along.

If I have to coerce or force my spouse to come back to me not on his OWN steam but because I eliminated my competition thus leaving me his ONLY option, what the hell have I really 'won?' Not a whole lot, in my opinion.
 

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I don't see scaring the OW or OM away from your cheating spouse - who WANTS that person in their life - as a 'goal' or a 'win.' No need to pity me just because I see it differently. Sorry, but I see it as lowering ones self to having to force their cheating spouse to treat them the way they SHOULD have been being treated all along.

If I have to coerce or force my spouse to come back to me not on his OWN steam but because I eliminated my competition thus leaving me his ONLY option, what the hell have I really 'won?' Not a whole lot, in my opinion.
He won, the end.
 
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