Talk About Marriage banner
Status
Not open for further replies.
1 - 9 of 9 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
170 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
H moving out next week and our arrangement is not legal seperation. He has agreed to pay a certain amount of money each month to support kids and our home while he is off living the single life. We have always had a joint account and 2 seperate accounts off of it. The bills get paid thru the joint account and we set aside some money for each of us to use privately in the Individual accounts.

The plan was for his Direct Deposit to continue coming into the joint account and each payday he would transfer the money for me to my account. Today he says he wants to change his DD to go into his individual account (which I have no access to) I said no, and when he asked me why I told him that I would have no access to it and what if he decided not to pay me.

Well I think I struck a nerve!! He is now wounded!!! He asked why I would think he would do something like that. I wanted to scream....."because you have done a whole **** load of things I never thought you would do recently!!!" I want to trust him but there is something telling me to not allow this.


What do you all think??
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
85 Posts
H moving out next week and our arrangement is not legal seperation. He has agreed to pay a certain amount of money each month to support kids and our home while he is off living the single life. We have always had a joint account and 2 seperate accounts off of it. The bills get paid thru the joint account and we set aside some money for each of us to use privately in the Individual accounts.

The plan was for his Direct Deposit to continue coming into the joint account and each payday he would transfer the money for me to my account. Today he says he wants to change his DD to go into his individual account (which I have no access to) I said no, and when he asked me why I told him that I would have no access to it and what if he decided not to pay me.

Well I think I struck a nerve!! He is now wounded!!! He asked why I would think he would do something like that. I wanted to scream....."because you have done a whole **** load of things I never thought you would do recently!!!" I want to trust him but there is something telling me to not allow this.


What do you all think??
Well my wife has told me she would pay her part of bills which so far she has been. I means whats the worse that can happen if he changes his DD?
I don't think he'll be too fond of going to court.

I'd advise having a joint account and you getting getting DD to your own account too and you each throw in your half of the bills in the joint
 

·
Administrator
Joined
·
45,105 Posts
If he decides to change where his DD goes there is nothing you can do about it. It's his check.

How would you not 'allow' it?

Do you have a job? Are you at SAHM?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
170 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
I work and make almost as much of him a month but he is moving out of our home, renting another place, leaving me with all the household bills that total 1300.00 a month more than I make. The kids are staying with me and I have his sister living in my basement as well!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,122 Posts
DON'T TRUST HIM FINANCIALLY!

Girl paleeese! DON'T! You need to go a legal route to get money financially period. He can pull rank on you in one phone call and close and acct. Done.

It was done to me...and here I sit trying to make ends meet while my stbxh is banking his paychecks and living for free...I NEVER thought he'd financially screw me...surprise surprise...

I don't give a CRAP how he looked wounded..don't give me that bs...gimme a break...Get played much?

Wake up woman...cover your [email protected]@...your getting separated...you want security? Lawyer up honey... you better get ur sht on paper...immediately... or you will be on here and in my shoes...because 'he' will have 'all' the control...and he will chose to use it...when he wants...
don't be a fool...like I was...and 'now' I have to go for back pay...

no kids invovld in my situation..but debt sure is...but still money is money..and i need money......
 

·
Administrator
Joined
·
45,105 Posts
Thanks for the clarification.

Does his sister pay any rent? How about for her food?

Do you know if the amount he has agreed to pay in informal child support is what you would get in court ordered child support? Are you aware of the child support guidelines for your state?

You really do need to talk to an attorney so that you know what your rights are. If he does not transfer funds to you as he has stated he will, tell your attorney to file immediately for interim child support and for any monies to cover bills that he is responsible for. Unfortunately, once he’s out of the house most of your bills are no longer his bills. So he might be able to wiggle out of paying them.
 
1 - 9 of 9 Posts
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top