He told you "you did not deserve sex"...again, mental abuse. My guess is he's a control freak. So when you withheld sex from him, he started criticizing and shouting at you because you were in control, not him. Don't think he's gay...sex before marriage would been bad/infrequent. Doubt an affair since you said he's not very attractive and he certainly doesn't sound like he has the smooth talking skills to talk a woman into bed. It sounds like he has mental issues....maybe depression or bipolar. Both can kill one's sex drive and it would also explain his outburts and how he treats you. Tough situtuation for sure, but I would get out before it may turn violent.Yes you have a point. It's hard to maintain perspective when you just have your thoughts rattling around in your head. Thanks for listening.
Sorry to harp on. But it actually does matter to me why he stop having sex with me. Its messing with my head a bit.