I am married to the most thoughtful, nicest man I have ever met, but I dislike the kind of person that I call a "nice guy" - a euphemism for the passive aggressive type that tries to control their partner through displays of weakness or kindness. "Nice guys" are anything but nice! They're controlling and manipulative.
In my mind, there's the "nice guy" and then there is a "good man." It's one of the topics I wrote about on my blog because the men who do this feel like they're left in the dust. The good men, on the other hand, are snatched up quickly and never have to wonder.
:iagree: with everything said here 100%.
Both you an Mavash have the correct interpretation of " nice guy."
Absolute NO woman wants to be married to a man who carries the " nice guy " label.
Nice guy = passive aggressive.
A lot of women are confusing " nice guy " with "good man."
A good man is one who has the qualities YOU look for and admire in a man, and more.
A " nice guy" is basically a dangerous, covert liar.
A nice guy is the equivalent of that girl in the office or group of friends who is always extremely obsequious and pleasant, but goes behind your back and sleeps with your man , or steal your promotion .
A " good man " does stuff to please you because he finds fulfillment and joy in pleasing you. A good man can respectfully disagree with your point of view , and work it out quite amicably.
A " nice guy" will pretend to go along with everything you say , while secretly resenting your dominance. He will smile and laugh with you,whilst secretly planning exactly how to get even with you.
In my opinion ( which may be flawed ), women who are dominant, tend to want " nice guys " because they think that they can be easily controlled.
In other words , a " nice guy " offers to them " the path on least resistance" in a relationship.
With a " nice guy " they can do whatever they want and be only accountable to themselves.
But a relationship takes hard work and sacrifice. Any relationship where only one person is doing all the " heavy lifting " cannot work.
A " good man " will hold you accountable for your actions, support your goal and ambitions, give you the respect you deserve , while at the same time expressing his needs and desires.
So maybe you ladies at confusing " nice guy " with " good man."