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Discussion Starter #1
I was married in August. I relocated with my children to another state to live with my husband and his father.
Two issues:
He is away 2 or 3 nights per week. When he is home, he gets made because his father is at the table with us and feels that his father is taking his place. He could stay at the table and eat and join in the conversations but does not. His father is going to move with his sister in a couple of months but he is still not happy.
The second issue is that his sex drive is very high. He feels that he has to have sex and talk about sex all day because he is not home 2 or 3 nights a week. It is already getting aggravatig and everytime we discuss it, it is supposed to be resolved but then it come up again, all day and night.

Help, I need advice!
 

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How long did you spend getting to know him before you got married and moved in with him? How far removed were you when you were dating. In other words, why are you taking this as anything other than this is who your husband is, and that trying to change him will be like pushing a rope?

How often would you like having sex? What was your sex life like before getting married? How old are the two of you?

C
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Discussion Starter #3
I think that you are misunderstanding the situation. I am fine with his father, it is him who isnt happy. Our sex life was good pror to marriage but it has changed now that we are married. It is all that we talk about or do. I am in no way trying to change him, it is him who is attempting to change me. Prior to marriage we new each other for 3 years and dated for 1 year before becoming engaged. I had no complaints from him prior to marriage and now, the complaints are from him about these 2 issues.
 

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Sounds like your husband is using sex as a way to reclaim his wife. For some reason he feels very threatened with the relationship you have with his father. I hope that when his father leaves things will go back to normal. (Although, it shouldn't take that to make things normal.) And sex every day, except for when he is away, is all good and fine provided both parties see it the same way. It shouldn't be considered a chore but rather a healthy, loving union.

When you two do have sex does he take the time to take care of you or is it just about him getting off? If it is just about him getting off then I can definitely see how you are beginning to see this as more of an obligation than something special between you two.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
We made love 3-4 times per week prior to marriage. It was fun, flirty and really fullfilling. I. I dont mind giving a little more and having sex 1 time per dayI feel that more than that is too much and is becoming like a chore. I wouldnt even mind 2 x sometimes but not all the time. He does not take time to be fun and flirting like he used too every time which I understand because we are having sex often. I think that you have an interesting perspective about reclaiming his wife. I just dont understand it as we are always joined at the hip and the only time that I talk to his dad is at dinner for about 20 mins. Is this normal? I had my mom stay with me in my last marriage and never even thought of that with my ex-husband. I would think that you want some family bonding. We take time to do things without his Dad and without the children. It makes me wonder if he feels like that with the kids too and is not saying anything. I don't know, I may be wrong.
 
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