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Thanks. I've said exactly that. She thinks that i am just a free for all bank. I spend every penny I have on her and the house. I veave myself with hardly anything. Usually around £200ish a week. And this is to get to work on or sort stuff if it crops up. I am SERIOUSLY considering giving her her P45!
I have a spreadsheet that i use to track income and expenditure each week with a 6 week look ahead. So I know it's not me who can't budget. Then when she asks for more sometimes because of a birthday or something else, I give her that. I'm spending fortunes each week on the house to renovate it and get it how she wants it. working weekends on the house as well as my normal work. I'm a consultant so have a number of clients.
I know i'm not tight or unreasonable on money whatsoever. I'm not that sort of person and never would be. But when you consider she doesn't have to contribute to a single household bill and I even put fuel in her car, I don't think i'm being bad or unreasonable.
It's only the two of you, so you should have a comfortable life taking home at least £100K. The house renovation madness has to stop. You just can't afford it. I'm afraid, you will have to put your foot down. If she doesn't like it, then she can have her P45! She might hate you for a while, but she'll get the message. If she doesn't, she is not the wife for you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #22 ·
It's only the two of you, so you should have a comfortable life taking home at least £100K. The house renovation madness has to stop. You just can't afford it. I'm afraid, you will have to put your foot down. If she doesn't like it, then she can have her P45! She might hate you for a while, but she'll get the message. If she doesn't, she is not the wife for you.
Thank you. I'm beginning to think that for myself anyway. It's been good to let off steam and be able to talk openly and frankly to anonymous people without being judged. Just honest straight answers.
Demographics. We're both in our early 50's and both on our second marriage.
 

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Thank you. I'm beginning to think that for myself anyway. It's been good to let off steam and be able to talk openly and frankly to anonymous people without being judged. Just honest straight answers.
Demographics. We're both in our early 50's and both on our second marriage.
Cheers for the demographics... only two of you on £100K with your wife having a part time job... you should not be having financial problems. Too much going out and it's not you... ;) If she wants more money, she can do more than 16 hours/week...
 

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Discussion Starter · #24 ·
Cheers for the demographics... only two of you on £100K with your wife having a part time job... you should not be having financial problems. Too much going out and it's not you... ;) If she wants more money, she can do more than 16 hours/week...
Unfortunately she can't do more than 16 hours a week, as she would get her remaining benefit stopped!. So she does mobile hairdressing which is where her additional income comes from. Always cash, so I don't really see any of it. Just what she's bought with it !
 

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Unfortunately she can't do more than 16 hours a week, as she would get her remaining benefit stopped!. So she does mobile hairdressing which is where her additional income comes from. Always cash, so I don't really see any of it. Just what she's bought with it !
Ah yes, of course... the 16 hours limit should have rang a bell. I think she has mistaken you for a cash cow.
 

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I gave her a second card from my personal account. Tht got stopped and she royally kicked off at me.
Every day there's an Amazon parcel delivery with some stupid crap in it or stuff she can't be bothered to go to the shop for.
I assume "kicked off" means your wife threw a tantrum. Fine. Let her kick and scream. But YOU are the one posting here. YOU are the one who isn't happy with the situation. So change it. Who gives a crap if she gets bent? If she was spending the money on something other than useless crap, fine. But she's not.

Again, YOU are the one unhappy with this situation. Either live with her careless spending or pull the plug on it. YOUR life. YOUR choice.
 
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Many people correctly advise to deal with this once and for all. Talk about costs and content. The situation looks very bad from your side
 
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