My husband and I have been married for 23 years. I have never once, until now, been concerned about another woman. He talked a few months ago about a female coworker that just helped his day go by so much easier, how funny she is, etc. He also mentioned that he had taken her some dessert back to work because she didn't get to go to lunch with the group. He mentioned one day that they had ridden to this group lunch together. I informed him that I felt that was an inappropriate thing to do and asked him not to do it again. My radar went up immediately. It really bothered me that he talked about her this way and would do nice things for her when he says he's so busy he doesn't have time to answer my texts or calls. I found out that they rode together to lunch again and confronted him with it. Needless to say it caused a huge fight. He thought I was being unreasonable because they're 'just friends.' I started checking his phone without his knowledge and came across some texts that had nothing to do with work. They were texting each other with jokes or teasing. This began another argument where I tried to explain to him that the attention they were giving each other was not appropriate and hurt my feelings. I felt she was getting attention when I wasn't. He promised no to ride with her again, he promised he wuoldn't delete any texts, etc. I found out a couple of weeks ago by checking his phone that they had ridden to lunch together again. He later deleted those texts from his phone. When I asked if he had ridden with her or deleted any texts he denied it. Obviously I knew he was lying and told him that. I told him that he needed to decide what was more important, his friendship or his marriage. It really hurts me that he continued to do the things I asked him not to and that he lied to me. He is normally a person that never lies. He says he deleted the texts because he knew I would get mad but he did say that he would stop the friendship, whatever he needed to do, because I was the only love in his life. Some days I'm ok and feel everything is alright and other days when I think of him lying to conceal this friendship I get mad all over again. Today they were texting about where each of them had lunch. They are with each other 9 hours a day and work right next to each other. At this point I am having trouble believing anything he says. Did they have lunch together and text because he thought I might see it and believe they didn't, or if they didn't lunch together why do they have to even know what the other was doing. I work in another county and I certainly didn't know where he had lunch. I asked him a couple of nights ago if he meant what he said about stopping the friendship, texting, etc., or if he was just trying to pacify me. He said they weren't texting anymore and I told him that I had some issues with trusting him which made him angry. He didn't speak or even look at me for two days. I asked him tonight why he was angry and he said he was 'tired of explaining' and 'sick of it.' He is still not speaking. I am driving myself crazy with this because I don't know what to do. Am I overreacting or am I right to be concerned? Help PLEASE!