Been a long time reader of the forums here, but just recently joined to solicit feedback from others. I'm a 41yr old male who has been married for 10 years with 2 kids, 8 and 6. My marriage has never been spectacular, but has continued to deteriorate to the point that I feel its unacceptable. There is absolutely no intimacy from either of us and sex is non-existant. She states she wants intimacy from me, but never exhibits any desire herself. We do not do anything together as just us and scoffs at the idea of "date night". Her fun time is out with her friends, the time with me is serious with the goal of taking care of the kids. She states she has no interest in sex with me. We have recently started marriage counseling (at my initiative) that I am not overly optimisitic about. I am the one who often tries to have dialouge about our relationship, but she never wants to talk about it and admits to wanting to avoid it. The only time she does talk me about the relationship and is actually intimate with me is after she is drunk. Even the day after, the hangover day, she is very nice to me and actually feels like she desires me. Once that wears off, it is back to the usual. She has stated the marriage is "good enough" for her. I have told her I want a wife, not a roommate. In the past, she has said "You better get used to it as it ain't going to change." Lately, she has stated she doesn't know what to change and then refuses to talk to me about it in order to figure it out. I am very frustated with the situation as no progress is being made. I seem to be the only one trying to improve, but she as said the "roommate" relationship is fine for her. I have tried to let things be as roommates, but it begins to eat at me as it isn't what I want. Any advice or thoughts?