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I agree with Maricha at this point this whole situation is going to lead to you resenting him. Plus I don't believe a word this girl is saying. It sounds like she and he have and emotional attachment. These usually lead to something more. Stop this now before something irreparable happens. You are not on equal footing and show him you mean business. This woman is obviously not wanting to just be friends. I pretty much talk to my childhood best friend once a month. Why? because we have lives separate from each other. This guy is emotionally attached otherwise it would be easy as hell to tell a friend to just back off. Friends respect boundaries.
 

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From reading this whole story the only thing I can surmise is the you married a man who was already married to someone else. I am sorry that your WH can't let go of this woman. I think that there is some obvious codependency here. The reason she is stepping up her game is because your WH seems like her big back up plan. She know she has him and is keeping him on the hook. However she won't commit to him. It is sad really that your WH can't see how the OW is playing him. I hope that you stay strong and I wouldn't even ask at this point for pulling back. If he wants to stay married it is 100% No contact or bust. This woman is toxic to him and is likely playing you both right now. She wants him single and when she gets tired of her common law man. She'll shack up with him. I am so sorry.
 
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