I suggest you read the posts on here about men who give their spouses EVERYTHING they want. If you haven't told your wife about what's going on in your head you're making a huge mistake. You need to sit her down and make her understand that the marriage isn't working for you in its current state. It should be a calm rational discussion without accusing her of anything. She will be defensive no matter what you do so keep a level head at all times. You've resorted to lying to your wife to keep her from bothering you yet that isn't helping your situation. Women often lose respect for men that they can control easily. Some women become so immersed raising children they forget about their husbands needs and sometimes their own. If your children are young this might be the case. The only way you'll turn this around is to change your behavior. Begging her for sex or asking her to change almost never works. I've been there. If your needing "man time" then inform her of what you'll be doing and do it. Don't ask for permission for anything. This is a sign that your wife thinks she owns you and knows you will bend to her will. In short, you need to grow some balls and act like a man. Boys seek approval from their mothers, but men should be the leaders of their families. If you can't lead then you will never gain her respect. Once she sees you leading she will change and you will be appealing to her again if there are no other issues. This could take a while and it requires consistency and a calm resolve that you will not accept your current situation. By the way, lying is also something that boys do.