My wife and I have a new marriage which is just over two years. But since about month two I have felt unhappy. Her personality started shifting shortly after we were married. I joined the service and while I was gone she was partying almost daily. The rare chances we got to talk she was just waking up (usually around 3-4pm). She then said she wanted to stop that life and made a promise she would stop. She continued to party, and would lie to me about it, but then admit it from guilt. Then came another promise. Then more lies. This process happened quite a few times. She would lie a lot about minor things that I would not even get upset about if she were honest. This was the start of things going down hill. Her mother is also taxing on our relationship. She is an abusive alcoholic (not towards my wife but other family members and boyfriends). She (her mother)has called me drunk yelling at me on more than one occasion. This lying process continued in our relationship from partying to looking at pornography. I didn't care if she looked at porn but she would just lie and literally yelled at me for even asking, but upon opening the internet browser shortly the after found porn left up. She has also cut her wrist twice since I have been with her after fighting. The one point where I think my heart finally broke is one random night we were laying together and she out of no where said she didn't trust me. Now I am obviously flawed like every person. But at this point I had never done anything to her to even remotely garnish this attitude. Also, as I said I am in the military, which I joined to provide for her, and she has told me on three differently occasions she regrets me for making this decision. I asked her a hundred times before I signed my life away that she was okay with it, but now she regrets me for it. Many different little things happened the past two years, and her personality has changed to where I don't recognize the person I'm with. She also complains and acts like her life is so hard, and usually blames me for it. I don't know what to do. I want to go to a marriage counselor but I don't know if a personality can be changed through counseling or her true colors have came out in marriage. I have been reading and it really sounds like she has borderline personality disorder. She usually has about 75% of the symptoms listed on websites. I just needed to vent, but if anyone has had a similar problem I would be glad to hear how you solved it, either way.