my parents dont like my boyfrnd

emily32 said:

hi everyone,
my name is emily and i am 32 yrs old. my problem is that i am in love with a guy who is 7 yrs younger than me. on top of that i come from a very wealthy family backround while he is a normal guy.
so other than the difficulties all couples have,
my parents dont like him even though they have never met him before and keep pressuring me to break up with him.
i am of course in love with him but i also love and respect my parents,and especially my dad the most in the world.
so this moment i am in a middle of a huge fight inside my head and outside about what should i do with my future....as i said i am 32 and of course not married or engaged....while he is still 24 and a kid.....
my parents dont like him cause of his backround and keep pressuring me to leave him and find someone my status and age and mary at some point.
so i need a 3rd person's opinion cause i really feel awefull
ty

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Ah...didn't I see this in a movie once? Or twice...

It's kind of hard to give advice when we know so little. If that is ALL they are worried about is his status, and you are in love, and he is otherwise good to you and treats you like you should be treated, then go for him. Sooner or later, you have to seperate your wants and needs from your parents' wants and needs you know? They can't live your life for you.

My parents were/are really controlling and it was hard for me to cut them off and decide that I need to do what I want and need to do for my life only. I had to understand that yes, they are my parents and I am their child and they only want what they think is best for me...but they aren't living my life anymore and they don't know everything that I am about. They don't see everything. If I'm headed for a trainwreck...well I am just going to have to learn from it myself.

My life hasn't been perfect but I wouldn't take anything back. They hated my husband too but I was and am in love with him and eventually they accepted him and learned to love him too. They had no choice...he was a part of my life.

I'm not saying I'm queen of making the best decisions here and that my life has been peachy...that's just my stand on it. When you do something strictly over your feelings of being "in love"...the dominos fall where they fall.

What do you want for your life? Does that include marriage? Children?

Have you discussed that with your bf? Because if that is what you want, your parents may not be entirely wrong. A 24 year old man and a 32 year old woman are typically in very different places in their lives. A 32 year old woman doesn't have 6 years to wait for her 24 year old man to grow up and want marriage and children. Or 6 years to wait to find out that he doesn't want marriage or children. If you want kids, you have time but not an endless amount of it.

What about the kind of lifestyle you want? Can that be supported by a 24 year old guy without the same level of wealth that you have/would want in your life for you and your future children? Do you think you can live on his income alone, as you would if you became a SAHM?

I'm not saying your parents are right or wrong, but they are thinking about your future and have some concerns. It wouldn't hurt you to explore those with your bf and make your own decisions about what is and isn't important to you for your life.