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3 Posts
I need help. A little background first, I have had marriage problems for most of my marriage. We have had counseling twice. The last time for 3 years. I finally stopped going because it was no longer helping. I would do my part the counselor would suggest, but my husband would never follow through with his part. Or if he did it was only directly after our appointment, he would follow her instructions that week. After that he stopped until the next appointment and the pattern developed. He only followed the counselors instructions right after our appointments, but never followed though for a longer period of time. After one of our many marriage discussions, I had a break through. The counselor had suggested my husband had Aspergers Syndrome, but never pursued it. I had recently read a book about Aspergers and realized in that discussion,this was my husband. He took a test and confirmed my feelings. That was about a 1 1/2 years ago. Since then I have tried to help him with this, but now uses it as an excuse for the way he is. So, our 25th anniversary was 3 weeks ago. He usually gives me a card and flowers from the grocery store on his way home from work. This year after our 24th I told him I was not going to plan anything, like I have so many times in the past. I said I wanted him to plan something. I gave him numerous suggestions throughout the year. Even a month before I suggested he google "what to do on a 25th Anniversay". So guess what happened. Yep, he came home with a card and flowers from the grocery store (which I had to arrange). He was all proud that he wrote me a poem in the card, instead of his usual canned response. By then I was already mad and in tears. He just didn't get it. He let's his fear paralyze him into inaction. Plus I bought him a gift, which sat unopened until yesterday when I returned it. I' m at my wits end with him. I' m a stay at home mom, no job, and just want out. Help what should I do?
