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Discussion Starter #1
I don’t want to go into details but my marriage is crumbling and it’s because of me. I have major trust issues and can’t get a grip on things right now. I’m in counciling and trying but my insecurities always take over.

My husband and I got into a fight this afternoon and he left for the night, blocked me and said “I love you so much, don’t want a divorce but you are making me misrrsble”

Please try not to judge me because this is not the whole story but he friend requested some hot 20 something year old who lives right next to where he works. He said he was just being “friendly”. I got a little upset but I got over it but he said he can’t take my jealousy and insecurities anymore.

He really is the love of my life, best friend and father to my little boy.

What do I do or say?
 

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Discussion Starter #3
Ok what he did is not ok. He doesn't need to friend request the hod 20 something. He doesn't need to be friendly with someone obviously not a friend to you both or your marriage.

This doesn't sound like random jealousy it sounds like gaslighting.
My husband isn’t the cheating type though and he is very loyal. He says he loves me, my kids and our son more than any girl. He said she friend requested him but he was weird about it.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
I don’t know what to believe. Why would she friend request him and not just tell me the truth right away...he skirted around the subject. He deleted her right away and said she didn’t matter.
 

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How old is he? How old are you? How long have you been married? How did you meet? Was he with someone when you met him?
 

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How old is he? How old are you? How long have you been married? How did you meet? Was he with someone when you met him?
I’m 35, he is 37. We met through a mutual friend and he wasn’t seeing anyone when I met him. He really isn’t the cheating type. He just texted me he is on his way home from his friends who I know and he loves me.
 

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I’m 35, he is 37. We met through a mutual friend and he wasn’t seeing anyone when I met him. He really isn’t the cheating type. He just texted me he is on his way home from his friends who I know and he loves me.
We have been married 3 years
 

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Discussion Starter #11
So do you have a history on illegitimate jealous reactions or is this the first one?
And if there is history what did those situations involve?
He is home almost every night and when he is not I know where he is and let’s me have access to his phone. He isn’t secretive
 

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I'm not saying this is right, but sometimes when someone is constantly treated as if they are breaking a rule...they end up breaking that rule because why not? If you're gonna treat me like I'm a cheater, I might as well get the perks of being a cheater.

Your jealousy is pushing him away...he's told you this over and over.
 

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What he's done is not ok. Very inappropriate, regardless of your insecurities. I don't know many women who would be ok with that.

It does NOT mean he's cheating with her - I want to be very clear about that. He's probably liking her photos (which is bad enough imo).

I'm surprised he would do this, given what's already gone on.
 

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I'm not saying this is right, but sometimes when someone is constantly treated as if they are breaking a rule...they end up breaking that rule because why not? If you're gonna treat me like I'm a cheater, I might as well get the perks of being a cheater.

Your jealousy is pushing him away...he's told you this over and over.
A brave post.
 
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Why do you feel so insecure about yourself?

Have your previous relationships been the same way?

What happened between the father of your older children and you?

Your insecurities and paranoia are going to destroy your marriage.
 

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Discussion Starter #20
Why do you feel so insecure about yourself?

Have your previous relationships been the same way?

What happened between the father of your older children and you!?

Your insecurities and paranoia are going to destroy your marriage.
I’m not ok. My marriage and life are gone a
Nd I’m not sure what to do
 
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