[Didthisreallyhappen]

About a week ago, my husband and I were coming back from our one year anniversary trip in Las Vegas. The trip went great and we had a good time but our layover in Atlanta was a nightmare. Delta decided that after 5 hours and it being 1:30am they were going to cancel our flight; this left us stranded until noon the next day.
We were starting to brainstorm on ideas for how to get back home since it was only about a 3 hour drive. My husband asked if I wanted him to call his sister and I said, 'no'. I cannot stand this female. The sound of her name makes me gag and she is not good to my husband at all. I thought for sure she wouldn't come even if he called her but out of some miracle she said she would come.
My husband kept telling me I was getting in the car and I kept telling him I wasn't and that I told him not to call her; I would rather wait for the plane. So 6am comes and he leaves with her leaving me at the airport by myself.
I believe in standing by your significant other no matter what but how do I continue to be there for him after he did this to me? He's done the opposite of what we decided on a few other times than this but this took the cake. How could he do this to me and how do I trust him again? I have been there for him for a lot and stood up for him many many times. I feel like such a fool. He doesn't really see why I am upset. I'm not sure what to do.

 

[Jellybeans]

Yeah that is wrong. He shoulda stayed w/ you.

My ex-H never left me at the airport but he did refuse to come get me once after a trip. We separated soon after.

 

[lisa3girls]

I am confused...you said you stand by what the two of you decide...but it sounds like neither of you agreed with the other-- did he agree NOT to call his sister, or did you just say no and he did it anyway?

I don't know, I guess at that point, I'd have gone ahead with the sister, not going, no matter how much you dislike her sounds petty to me. And it isn't like you had no way home, you decided you wanted to wait for the plane right?

 

[lisa3girls]

Yeah that is wrong. He shoulda stayed w/ you.

My ex-H never left me at the airport but he did refuse to come get me once after a trip. We separated soon after.

Eh...I don't get it..I never asked my husband to get me from a trip. I travel alot for work, and it is really inconvenient sometimes. That is what airport parking is for.

 

[reachingshore]

Let me put it this way.. if I had a sister in law and if I hated her, I'd be more than happy to have her dragged out of bed in the middle of the night and drive me home.

Bad bad hubby for leaving you at the airport. Bad bad wifey for not letting hubby handle the forced-to-sleep-at-the-airport situation for her.

 

[Jellybeans]

Eh...I don't get it..I never asked my husband to get me from a trip. I travel alot for work, and it is really inconvenient sometimes. That is what airport parking is for.

I didn't have a ride home and he refused plain and simple to come and get me.

We didn't separate cause of that though, but that was one of the things that happened before we did.

That is great you use the airport parking and never asked him for a ride. In my case, I needed one.

 

[COGypsy]

Yeah, I do have to say--I'm not sure that I entirely understand wanting to spend 12 hours wandering around the Las Vegas airport as opposed to just sucking up 3 or 4 hours with someone who's willing to drive 6 hours round trip in the middle of the night to take you home....

I certainly think that there should be a degree of loyalty in marriage, but it doesn't seem like a huge betrayal for him to try whatever he could think of to get you guys home. If he was willing to reach out to her given how their history sounds, it seems like I'd smile, say "thank you" and promptly fall "asleep" on the way back.

 

[CallaLily]

I understand you're upset about him leaving you there, but if his sister was your meal ticket home during that time, you might should have swallowed your hatred for her long enough for her to at least get you home.

I would imagine your husband was upset with the fact you felt the way you did about his sister. No, its not a reason to leave you there, but maybe him getting home seemed a little more important to him than you feeling the way you did about his sister.

 

[magnoliagal]

12 hours in an airport vs 3 hours in a car? That's a no brainer. I'd have left you too and wouldn't have felt bad about it either. You are a grown woman you had a choice. You could go with him or you could stay. You stayed. Don't punish him for that.

I used to travel for a living so I've spent more than my share of nights in the airport....alone so this to me isn't a big deal.

 

[trey69]

It could be that even though you view your husband leaving you there as being wrong or selfish, your husband may view you as being wrong and selfish for not returning home with him all because of his sister. So, while you may feel he hurt your feelings by leaving, its possible his feelings were hurt by you staying.

 

[lisa3girls]

12 hours in an airport vs 3 hours in a car? That's a no brainer. I'd have left you too and wouldn't have felt bad about it either. You are a grown woman you had a choice. You could go with him or you could stay. You stayed. Don't punish him for that.

I used to travel for a living so I've spent more than my share of nights in the airport....alone so this to me isn't a big deal.

Me too

 

[Runs like Dog]

About a week ago..

So that's the hill you want to die on. Has that stubbornness served you well, elsewhere in your marriage? Or is it symptomatic of a cycle of push backs that always end like this?

Did you feel he was choosing her over you? Did you feel disrespected? Or just disobeyed?

 

[chillymorn]

hes right your wrong.


I would of left you also!

boho I don't like the driver so I'm not going.

childlike

 

[swedish]

The phrase 'any port in a storm' comes to mind. Your husband was trying to solve the problem so neither of you would end up in the airport all night. Once he made the call and she agreed to come, it would be very rude for either of you to be anything less than gracious to her for that. Sounds like you were being stubborn because you didn't want him to call her in the first place, but it wasn't as if he was calling her to hang out, you were both in a bind.

 

[Deejo]

I can certainly understand why you are upset, but given your behavior under the circumstances you describe?

I would have left you there as well.

You are both culpable in this. You each made your own decision - and both decisions were made out of frustration. As Runs Like Dog said, is this really the hill you want to die on?

If it is, your being left at the airport is only a piece of a much larger problem.

 

[2nd_t!me iz_best]

guess who won in this one?
his sister.
how about that...

 

[eagleclaw]

I concur with everyone else. You had a problem, he found a solution. You then decided you didn't like the solutioon and wanted to do something else. That's on you.

I would have done the same because you left him no real choice. And as you said yourself - you should have stuck with him!

But it sounds like that rule only applies to him sticking with you, based on what you would like to do. It goes both ways.

His solutions was the best given the circumstances. He actioned it and inconvienenced a relative to come get you guys. Then you decided to be difficult. I'm suprised he's not the one posting here...

 

[committed4life]

he is the man you should allow him to make the decision in this case, no matter how much you dislike her you should have gone with him.

 

[eagleclaw]

He can lead all he wants, but he can't make you follow. That's a choice only you can make. You chose not to.

 

[sisters359]

Geez, make your own decision and accept the consequences. I don't buy into any of that "he's the man" crap, but once each of you made your own choice, live with it. Don't blame him; he has every right to make his own decision, too. You didn't like his, so you made a different one. He does not have to "protect" you; you are a grown up. Lighten up and let go of this one!