Phone bill look for numbers repeatedly dialed.We are both 40, 2 kids (teenagers), married 16 years. We have been doing alot of talking and crying together. Recent life events = new job titles with more responsibilities. I’ve been really good at detective mode in the past. However that was easy when phones didn’t have pass codes and face recognition lol. I just miss him. If you have suggestions on these “detective skill” I’m all ears.
Try marriage counseling. Try to work out your issues that way.I was miserable after the pandemic hit. I lashed out a lot, I was rude, in return, he became rude. It’s s vicious cycle. We both started doing our own thing instead of things with each other. Then a massive argument over the 4th of July and he lost all will at intamacy after that.
Hmmmm,I was miserable after the pandemic hit. I lashed out a lot, I was rude, in return, he became rude. It’s s vicious cycle. We both started doing our own thing instead of things with each other. Then a massive argument over the 4th of July and he lost all will at intamacy after that.
What was said during the really bad fight? That may be the key to why he has said this. There are certain things that when said can be so damaging that they are very hard to come back from. Maybe if you can be honest and tell us what was said we may understand the situation much better.Thank you for that! I miss both lol if that makes sense. The issue is that I want him, but he is very verbal in that he does not want to be intimate with me in any way… at least not right now. I think part of it is attraction. I gained 30 lbs after Covid, we both started drinking a lot more, he shut down and stopped caring, so I did. It was a vicious cycle. We began just going through the motions , doing our own thing until all of a sudden our sex life, marriage and connection were not s priority. But for a man to not want intimacy worries me, just looking for suggestions to break the ice. Both of us have lost weight, and are hyper focused on our health, He is being stubborn because he feels hurt by some things that were said during s really bad fight.
It may well be something said that was very hurtful. Words can wound deeply.@LittleMissHopeful what are you keeping from us?
40 year old men just simply do not declare that the marital sex life is over until they have moved in with their next woman and are waiting for the divorce to go through…. And even then, most will continue to hook up with both for as long as they can.
What is the reason he has unilaterally declared a state of Celibacy in your marriage?
And it’s not just a bad fight or a 30 lb weight gain. What is the real reason?
Yeah, that’s why there has to be more to this than a fight and some weight gain over lockdown.It may well be something said that was very hurtful. Words can wound deeply.
What about 40 year old women?Yeah, that’s why there has to be more to this than a fight and some weight gain over lockdown.
What was said and how much of a personal attack was it?
Men do have feelings and their feelings can be hurt.
But 40 year men do not declare a sex life over unless they are moving in with their next chick.
Yes, there is more going on here than an argument and lockdown weight gain.Has anyone noticed that when questions get asked to clarify a OP's statement, where the answer might paint the OP in less favorable light, its "Crickets"? I believe many times the OP is seeking validation and can't admit that they have contributed to the problem they ask about.
Indeed. I had a friend who after divorce continued with his XW on FB basis for years. They enjoyed sex together but couldn't stand all the other aspects of being married.Most men are even cool with hooking up with their wives during divorce proceedings or even hooking up after divorce.