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I didn't really know where else to put this than the family section, just need to kind of unload.
When I met my husband, his mother seemed pretty cool, I am from the UK, my husband and his family are from the Netherlands. I got along with her for about 4 weeks. But then we started clashing when I realised where all my husbands hard earned money was going. One his pay day he said he wanted to take me out for dinner, I got all excited when payday came and went, no dinner. I asked him if he forgot, turns out his mother needed his money to pay off her own debts for the month. I was shocked but I thought a one off is ok, but then I sat for about 3 hours talking to my husband about his mum taking all his money, it wasn't a one off. I obviously questioned why it his responsibility to pay his mums debts. The only answer I got was that if he said no, he would be homeless. He thought giving his mum all his money was normal, his mum had made him believe it was normal. I kind of felt I needed to intervene a little because he is such a hard working man and was getting no reward at all for it. It ended in a big argument that made me look like the bad guy, his mum said I was stabbing her in the back and that my husbands grandmother would be turning in her grave etc. This led to my husband giving up another months wages. I left the Netherlands after she threw me out for daring to spend a little bit of my husbands wages on something for him, I think it was some perfume or something. I moved to England, found out I was pregnant so I called my husband to tell him and he said he would move to England, I said it was his choice, it was a big thing to do. His mother then began the abuse, she told my daughter was not my husbands child and that she demaded a DNA test and that she would not allow her son to leave The Netherlands because he only needs one woman in his life...her. I ignored it and carried on preparing for the arrival of the baby. I then got a text message out of nowhere telling me I should stay in England alone and have an abortion. I went to my mother and fell apart, I could not understand why this woman hated me so much. Eventually my husband joined me in England and we moved into a nice home and when it came time to give birth, his mum showed up the day after, I was in agony, I was fully focused on getting straight in the shower when they got to the hospital and thats what I did. Next thing I know, his mum is sulking outside the hospital saying she feels left out because my parents had taken a step back because they could see the baby any day they wanted and his parents were only there for a day, but she didn't see it like that. I was furious, I was in alot of pain, dealing with doctors 20 questions and sign here here and here, but she felt left out...well I am ****ing sorry! But I ignored it, we decided we didn't need her in our lives and cut her off for about a year. She came back asking for forgiveness but she never stated what for. After about 2 years of living in the UK, we fancied moving back to The Netherlands, I liked the place. So we saved up enough and got Husb sorted with a job and we bought an appartment. His mother became her usual nasty self again, she asked why we felt we couldn't stay at their house until we were fully on our feet and that it was yet another knife in her back. She was calling me awful names to my brother in law. It then came to Husbs Grandmothers Birthday, or what would have been, and his mother messaged him saying his Grandmother would be turning in her grave for how we have treated her and that she was going to mail his work to get him to lose his job and that when we end up homeless she was going to fight to take our Daughter away. I felt because we had moved back to The Netherlands, she had the upper hand, I love the country but can't stay here, shes like a dark cloud looming over and I feel like when our Daughter starts school there is nothing stopping his mum just walking in and taking her out of school with a note for the dentist or something. She has always bad mouthed me to anybody she has come into contact with, mainly bar staff at the pubs near her house, she has full control over my brother in laws bank account now and even gets a text message when he gets paid and she transfers all his money almost instantly into her account. I have had murderous thoughts about this woman.
Has anybody else had any similar Mother in Law issues?
xx
When I met my husband, his mother seemed pretty cool, I am from the UK, my husband and his family are from the Netherlands. I got along with her for about 4 weeks. But then we started clashing when I realised where all my husbands hard earned money was going. One his pay day he said he wanted to take me out for dinner, I got all excited when payday came and went, no dinner. I asked him if he forgot, turns out his mother needed his money to pay off her own debts for the month. I was shocked but I thought a one off is ok, but then I sat for about 3 hours talking to my husband about his mum taking all his money, it wasn't a one off. I obviously questioned why it his responsibility to pay his mums debts. The only answer I got was that if he said no, he would be homeless. He thought giving his mum all his money was normal, his mum had made him believe it was normal. I kind of felt I needed to intervene a little because he is such a hard working man and was getting no reward at all for it. It ended in a big argument that made me look like the bad guy, his mum said I was stabbing her in the back and that my husbands grandmother would be turning in her grave etc. This led to my husband giving up another months wages. I left the Netherlands after she threw me out for daring to spend a little bit of my husbands wages on something for him, I think it was some perfume or something. I moved to England, found out I was pregnant so I called my husband to tell him and he said he would move to England, I said it was his choice, it was a big thing to do. His mother then began the abuse, she told my daughter was not my husbands child and that she demaded a DNA test and that she would not allow her son to leave The Netherlands because he only needs one woman in his life...her. I ignored it and carried on preparing for the arrival of the baby. I then got a text message out of nowhere telling me I should stay in England alone and have an abortion. I went to my mother and fell apart, I could not understand why this woman hated me so much. Eventually my husband joined me in England and we moved into a nice home and when it came time to give birth, his mum showed up the day after, I was in agony, I was fully focused on getting straight in the shower when they got to the hospital and thats what I did. Next thing I know, his mum is sulking outside the hospital saying she feels left out because my parents had taken a step back because they could see the baby any day they wanted and his parents were only there for a day, but she didn't see it like that. I was furious, I was in alot of pain, dealing with doctors 20 questions and sign here here and here, but she felt left out...well I am ****ing sorry! But I ignored it, we decided we didn't need her in our lives and cut her off for about a year. She came back asking for forgiveness but she never stated what for. After about 2 years of living in the UK, we fancied moving back to The Netherlands, I liked the place. So we saved up enough and got Husb sorted with a job and we bought an appartment. His mother became her usual nasty self again, she asked why we felt we couldn't stay at their house until we were fully on our feet and that it was yet another knife in her back. She was calling me awful names to my brother in law. It then came to Husbs Grandmothers Birthday, or what would have been, and his mother messaged him saying his Grandmother would be turning in her grave for how we have treated her and that she was going to mail his work to get him to lose his job and that when we end up homeless she was going to fight to take our Daughter away. I felt because we had moved back to The Netherlands, she had the upper hand, I love the country but can't stay here, shes like a dark cloud looming over and I feel like when our Daughter starts school there is nothing stopping his mum just walking in and taking her out of school with a note for the dentist or something. She has always bad mouthed me to anybody she has come into contact with, mainly bar staff at the pubs near her house, she has full control over my brother in laws bank account now and even gets a text message when he gets paid and she transfers all his money almost instantly into her account. I have had murderous thoughts about this woman.
Has anybody else had any similar Mother in Law issues?
xx
