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Monitoring your SO on a just-in-case basis

28K views 331 replies 60 participants last post by  BoSlander 
Hi all!

Had a guys-night-out last night with 3 friends. Two of them are single and the other one is married. All were very concerned about my divorce and how it basically came “out of nowhere.” Although I wanted to spend ZERO time talking about it, they kept asking questions about the circumstances so I basically told them everything. What was really revealing is that one of the single guys and the married dude have a girlfriend/wife that is in constant contact with coworkers of the opposite sex. The married dude even mentioned that sometimes his wife comes home and heads straight for the shower (he says she blames COVID-LOL) and goes to work wearing Victoria Secrets’ thongs. In a nutshell, I saw red flags everywhere. So, being that they are my friends and I do not want them to go through the same sh-t I did, I gave them a guideline as to what to do (obviously told them to check out TAM so that they could see I wan’t bluffing).

I basically told them that they ought to monitor their SO even if all is ok. I suggested they monitor their 1) texting/calls, 2) their internet activity (facebook+instagram included), 3) their social interactions, 4) their traveling and 5) their nights out. I also told them to do this right after their nights out or after they noticed a subtle change in behavior or if they see their SO deleting texts.

Was I out of line? Did I miss anything? Doing some preventive monitoring isn’t going to kill their SO.
So wearing VS thong to work is nothing to jump to conclusions about! Now if she only wears VS thongs when going out or when it’s date night (she’s trying to be sexy for significant other) and is all the sudden wearing to work Then worry and start investigating. My wife only wears VS Thongs and Bra‘s but that is everyday but that is her preference in being comfortable.
If she is showering as soon as getting home huge red flag if she don’t do it everytime she goes out.
the lies just add to all his other problems and she needs to be his ex wife!
 
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