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How many real friends do you have?
Enough, some from school, some I served with and some from other places.

Does your wife allow you to have friends?
That's a bit weird, being married didn't and hasn't removed my autonomy. I do as I please as does my wife.

Of which I have male and female friends. Plus on various occasions throughout the time we have been married, I have once slept over at a woman friends place alone (on her lounge). And caught up for dinner with some other women friends individually, or with others all without my wife being there.
 

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The W and I don't "allow" each other to do stuff.

I find few men maintain friendships. I correspond w/ a handful of people, most of the ones who keep in touch are female. I send a holiday card to an old male friend and his wife, and his wife sends one back.

Now that the pandemic is here, more men are keeping in touch via email.
 

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“Allow”???? Did you just say “allow”??? Wow...

I have five really good friends. Ones that I meet for lunch or dinner. Go to each other’s houses for kids bday parties. Watch sports with. Play poker with. Been away on vacation with two of them. Golfing in Myrtle Beach and football game in Minnesota. As crappy as my marriage was, I was always “allowed” to go. I never had to ask for permission and she wouldn’t expect me to anyway.

Unless you are up to no good (excessive drinking, womanizing or drugs), if she’s objecting to you having friends, it’s a big red flag.
 

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My husband is from Oz and moved to the UK age 30, so has no friends from that time now. We have lived in 4 different counties in the last few years so each time we have had to leave friends behind. We are both still in touch with some friends from previous places we have lived but mainly by email etc. We have lived where we do now for 7 months but due to covid havent been able to get to a church or to any groups or take up hobbies. He joins with a mens group on zoom once a week from where we lived before, and they all get on well and pray for each other and chat etc but hopefully in the next few months we can get out there and actually meet people in person and begin to make new friends.
The only time I may not be happy about him having a particular male friend is if the male friend was a really bad influence say.
 

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male 53; i had two but one died in June and the other is 73; this is a real issue for me

wife is encouraging me to make more but people are so much work.
 

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It would never occur to me to even think to either allow or disallow my husband to have friends. That just seems...bizarre....

My guy has 4 very good male friends. Most of them live too far away now for regular get-togethers. So, we make it a point to visit with each of them a couple times a year in either our town or theirs - either as couples or sometimes just the guys. He'll also meet up with them for dinner or drinks if they happen to be in the same area for work, as most of them are in the same field. And he talks to all of them via email, text, telephone or social media at least several times a month.

He has other friends, mostly old military buddies, that he's not as close with but still maintains semi-regular contact. They'll get together if they find themselves in the same area.
 
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I have many male friends, mainly centered around activities such as biking and climbing... Honestly, they are essential for a happy guy life. Planning for a bike ride goes something like this: "riding XXX today, trailhead at 5:30, beer after". Response: "yup". And off we go. No baggage, no subtext, just a killer ride and a good time. I do not seek permission or approval for any of this.
 

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I am still close to my best pal from grade school, several of my college football teammates, and two of my best pals from the Corps. These extend over 50 years with my grade school pal, and 30 plus with football teammates and Corps.
 
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How many real friends do you have?

Does your wife allow you to have friends?
I have a good group of friends in town. We have a lot of guys night type things. We do football pools, we have a paddle tennis group, a cycling group, a mens steak club and we do mens ski trips. The event of the year is our football pool award dinner. We rent out a restaurant for the night and present the pool winner with a trophy. Usually we hold it during march madness which we also have a pool for.

My wife encourages me to hang with the boys as she too has a similar group of ladies in town.

We also have a lot of parties for both the guys and the girls.

Basically our town is like a college campus most of the time.
 

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I have a handful of really close friends, some male, some female. Most now live far away, but I'm making some new - potentially great - friends in my new location. They are now our friends to some degree.

There is no "allow" - we support and encourage each other to have friends and be happy in many ways.
 

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Discussion Starter #18
Oh, you were asking for a friend. Okay.
Plenty of time to throw out guesses, assumptions and hate.

I grew up in the era of sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me. So I just see animosity here.

A guy I regularly play tennis with is on VERY short rope with his wife. She's the Air Traffic Controller of It All. Can hardly squeeze him out of her grips to play tennis once in a while. Sucks to be him. Some of us get beer in the summer after playing. He's screwed when it comes to this.

There's the backstory. Enjoy.
 

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A guy I regularly play tennis with is on VERY short rope with his wife. She's the Air Traffic Controller of It All. Can hardly squeeze him out of her grips to play tennis once in a while. Sucks to be him. Some of us get beer in the summer after playing. He's screwed when it comes to this.
Any man in such a grip is only in that grip because he chooses to be. His wife only has power over him, because he lets her.
 

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Plenty of time to throw out guesses, assumptions and hate.

I grew up in the era of sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me. So I just see animosity here.

A guy I regularly play tennis with is on VERY short rope with his wife. She's the Air Traffic Controller of It All. Can hardly squeeze him out of her grips to play tennis once in a while. Sucks to be him. Some of us get beer in the summer after playing. He's screwed when it comes to this.

There's the backstory. Enjoy.
Did you have permission to say that ?
 
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