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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So here's my story....

I met hubby online 7 years ago. He lived abroad and I in the states. We communicated daily via texts, emails, webcam and phone calls and there was plenty of sexy chat, naughty emails (w/pictures) and webcam dirties. That was a huge part of who we were and how we started. When we finally met in person, there were serious fireworks. Two years later he moved to the states and we were married. The relationship was great, as was the sex. In the last year, sex has declined. He doesn't become aroused like he used to and sex is sporadic, to say the least. It has turned into a negative cycle....I don't get any sex, I'm unhappy, I ***** and nitpick about things that don't normally bother me, we argue, he's not attracted to THAT girl and he certainly doesn't want to doink her....and around and around it goes. I am not against doing anything in the bedroom and we have engaged in just about everything so it certainly isn't me not being experimental, challenging, willing...whatever. When we do have sex, he sometimes cannot finish. He has gone to the doctor and tried medication but that does not always work. Other times, he has taken nothing and we have gone at it for ages. I don't know what we need at this point. Is this a mindset, a physical issue, what? I feel I am always hot and bothered...even a dirty song can set me off. Not sure what to do anymore. I would appreciate any and all ideas, feedback, suggestions....
 

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How old is your husband? Over the age of 40, some men will experience a lessening of sexual drive, mostly due to physical problems. You said he had taken medication, which sometimes works sometimes doesn't. That means something is wrong with him physically, and if it's physical then it's not your fault. Just be a good loving wife and help him to overcome his physical problems. I am sure your sex life will improve when he has regained his former abilities.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Nothing else has changed other than the increasing amount of time we have been together. Apart from normal illnesses and activity related aches and pains, we are both healthy. We have both gained a few pounds in 5 years but it has been an equal gain and we have talked about whether it is impairing our ability to remain as attracted to each other as we once were and that doesn't seem to be a problem. I am trying to be patient and letting him initiate things when he feels comfortable doing so but we can go weeks and then I'll subtly mention something about not having had sex in awhile and he'll say something like, "I was just thinking about that" but he rarely prompts it.
 
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