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Exercise to keep fit-that's more for me though

Try to look my best both in public and at home -no frumpy clothes or PJs
Show him I'm interested in his life, work, and activities.

Make sure our conversations are about more than about the kids and house.

I let him know I appreciate him and what he does for our family as often as I can

Respect him
 

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Keep in shape

Keep the house clean and organized

Cook delicious and healthy meals

Be responsible with our finance

Let him have his hobbies

Respect him and let him make the important decisions for us

Have meaningful and intellectual conversation with him

Tell him often that I am very lucky to have met him and I am his wife

Tell him often that he is making me a very happy woman

Have hot sex with him regularly
 

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Keep in shape

Keep the house clean and organized

Cook delicious and healthy meals

Be responsible with our finance

Let him have his hobbies

Respect him and let him make the important decisions for us

Have meaningful and intellectual conversation with him

Tell him often that I am very lucky to have met him and I am his wife

Tell him often that he is making me a very happy woman

Have hot sex with him regularly
^^^Yes!! I can't believe I left that out. Add to that flirting and hitting on him. Haha
 

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We do fun things together.

He needs to lose weight so I've been making him lunch every day since September.

I keep in good shape.

We kiss hello and goodbye always. We tell each other that we love each other daily.

Since my oldest turned 13, we've been going on date nights almost every weekend.
 

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Discussion Starter #7
We do fun things together.

He needs to lose weight so I've been making him lunch every day since September.

I keep in good shape.

We kiss hello and goodbye always. We tell each other that we love each other daily.

Since my oldest turned 13, we've been going on date nights almost every weekend.
That's something else I need to do: date night. We tend to spend the weekends cleaning and working on the house.
 

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I have to do more flirting and hitting on him. If you treat your husband like a new boyfriend it makes the marriage sexy.
Flirting with your husband can be very interesting.

One time a friend told me that she doesn't need to seduce her husband anymore because they are already married. I told her that I thought just the opposite. We need to seduce our husbands even more after we are married.

Grab his butt, spank his ass, smile at him mischievously and seductively, play with his toy, etc..............................:D
 

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Flirting with your husband can be very interesting.

One time a friend told me that she doesn't need to seduce her husband anymore because they are already married. I told her that I thought just the opposite. We need to seduce our husbands even more after we are married.

Grab his butt, spank his ass, smile at him mischievously and seductively, play with his toy, etc..............................:D
You're sooo right! I'm always putting my hand on his package. ;)
 

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Flirting with your husband can be very interesting.

One time a friend told me that she doesn't need to seduce her husband anymore because they are already married. I told her that I thought just the opposite. We need to seduce our husbands even more after we are married.

Grab his butt, spank his ass, smile at him mischievously and seductively, play with his toy, etc..............................:D
If the man loves Sex (don't they all).... there is no better thing you can do ...got to keep it
Get creative, surprise him... with some lingerie... Seduce, tease and Please, come up behind him, ravish him with your seductive charm... straddle yourself over him when he is sitting down & tell him what you want to do to him. And lots of handling of that gearshift at night.

I wasn't always like this...what a waste of yrs, I was too into our kids in the past... Now I am a little overdrive here... he loves this & it has made ME happier too.

But really... whatever your husbands Primary Love Languages are... DO these things.. My husbands is Physical touch, so this works well for us. If your man is Acts of Service, and you aren't keeping the house clean (enough) or making him good meals on a daily basis, this might frustrate him.



Some other stuff I feel is important....

1. I talk to my husband about my hopes, fears, daily joys, & look back upon memories together.... (Communication)

2. We laugh, tease, please, make fun of each other & banter our way through life. Laughter is good for the soul.

3. I greet him with a :) - happily receptive to his hugging, a kiss....when he comes home from work - always an
on my lips..various times of the day & when we lay our heads at night.

4. Helping him with his projects -when he needs a hand ~ with a good attitude.

5. Planning vacations for the 2 of us and/or family ventures...we all need to get away sometimes, create new memories.

6. Being a good Mom, husbands love when the kids are taken care of, and chaos is controlled within the home.

7. In all things, it is our attitude, a husband will so appreciate a Happy wife to come home to every day...this fulfills them. So often our demeanor can affect our partners - can upset a fine day even.

8. And always, think YOUNG, dating again....LOOK good for your man, just cause you are married, doesn't mean let it all go .....so he is proud to have you on his arm when you go out & about... and within the home, dress enticingly. Just makes it all the more FUN !
 

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If the man loves Sex (don't they all).... there is no better thing you can do ...got to keep it
Get creative, surprise him... with some lingerie... Seduce, tease and Please, come up behind him, ravish him with your seductive charm... straddle yourself over him when he is sitting down & tell him what you want to do to him. And lots of handling of that gearshift at night.

I wasn't always like this...what a waste of yrs, I was too into our kids in the past... Now I am a little overdrive here... he loves this & it has made ME happier too.

But really... whatever your husbands Primary Love Languages are... DO these things.. My husbands is Physical touch, so this works well for us. If your man is Acts of Service, and you aren't keeping the house clean (enough) or making him good meals on a daily basis, this might frustrate him.



Some other stuff I feel is important....

1. I talk to my husband about my hopes, fears, daily joys, & we look back upon our memories together.... (Communication)

2. We laugh, tease, please, make fun of each other & banter our way through life. Laughter is good for the soul.

3. I greet him with a :) - receptive to his a hug, his kiss...when he comes home from work - always an
on my lips..various times of the day & when we lay our heads at night.

4. Helping him with his projects -when he needs a hand ~ with a good attitude.

5. Planning vacations for the 2 of us and/or family ventures...we all need to get away sometimes, create new memories.

6. Being a good Mom, husbands love when the kids are taken care of, and chaos is controlled within the home.

7. In all things, it is our attitude, a husband will so appreciate a Happy wife to come home to every day...this fulfills them. So often our demeanor can affect our partners - can upset a fine day even.

8. And always, think YOUNG, dating again....LOOK good for your man, just cause you are married, doesn't mean let it all go to pot...so he is proud to have you on his arm when you go out & about... and within the home, dress enticingly. Just makes it all the more FUN !
This does take a lot of effort. I'll admit my moods don't always allow me to put in this kind of time. There are times when I'm feeling unhappy and the last thing I want to do is have sex. Everyone needs to work with their own capabilities in keeping the marriage interesting. But holding someones hand and listing to what they have to say without judgement can be sexier than all the lingerie at Victoria's Secret.
 

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This does take a lot of effort. I'll admit my moods don't always allow me to put in this kind of time. There are times when I'm feeling unhappy and the last thing I want to do is have sex. Everyone needs to work with their own capabilities in keeping the marriage interesting.
What is your & your husbands Primary Love Languages - tests on this thread >>

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/general-relationship-discussion/12569-what-r-you-spouses-love-languages-how-does-affect-your-marraige.html


But holding someones hand and listing to what they have to say without judgement can be sexier than all the lingerie at Victoria's Secret.
Is your husband not fulfilling YOU in this area, you crave his listening and emotional closeness??

How does he handle knowing the last thing on your mind is sex -on such days ?? For many men- they will take this as rejection and a slow growing resentment will spring... if this happens often and they are craving the sexual connection with their wives.

I have not read your story Amyd....so I may be WAY off....but it's a common problem in marriages... Husband craving the sexual, wives craving the emotional and they continue to miss each other.... and grow further apart.

It does seem like "work" when the others love languages are polar opposites of each other. The communication needs opened up in these areas ...and a willingness on both sides ...to please the other.
 

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What is your & your husbands Primary Love Languages - tests on this thread >>

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/general-relationship-discussion/12569-what-r-you-spouses-love-languages-how-does-affect-your-marraige.html




Is your husband not fulfilling YOU in this area, you crave his listening and emotional closeness??

How does he handle knowing the last thing on your mind is sex -on such days ?? For many men- they will take this as rejection and a slow growing resentment will spring... if this happens often and they are craving the sexual connection with their wives.

I have not read your story Amyd....so I may be WAY off....but it's a common problem in marriages... Husband craving the sexual, wives craving the emotional and they continue to miss each other.... and grow further apart.

It does seem like "work" when the others love languages are polar opposites of each other. The communication needs opened up in these areas ...and a willingness on both sides ...to please the other.
I Love quizes! I'm going to take your quiz after this post.

Sex isn't and never was a huge part of my marriage. Me and my husband have similar sex drives, sometimes mine is a bit higher but that's where Brookstone shopping comes in handy.

Here's my story:

I have Borderline Personality Disorder and I'm married to a wonderful man who I love. I have a blog that discusses my warped mind in detail:

"You Know You're Borderline When…" | Jaen Wirefly, LMSW
 

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Discussion Starter #15
What is your & your husbands Primary Love Languages - tests on this thread >>

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/general-relationship-discussion/12569-what-r-you-spouses-love-languages-how-does-affect-your-marraige.html




Is your husband not fulfilling YOU in this area, you crave his listening and emotional closeness??

How does he handle knowing the last thing on your mind is sex -on such days ?? For many men- they will take this as rejection and a slow growing resentment will spring... if this happens often and they are craving the sexual connection with their wives.

I have not read your story Amyd....so I may be WAY off....but it's a common problem in marriages... Husband craving the sexual, wives craving the emotional and they continue to miss each other.... and grow further apart.

It does seem like "work" when the others love languages are polar opposites of each other. The communication needs opened up in these areas ...and a willingness on both sides ...to please the other.
My results:

11 Acts Of Service, 8 Quality Time, 5 Words Of Affirmation, 2 Gifts, and 4 Physical Touch!
 

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I Love quizes! I'm going to take your quiz after this post.

Sex isn't and never was a huge part of my marriage. Me and my husband have similar sex drives, sometimes mine is a bit higher but that's where Brookstone shopping comes in handy.

Here's my story:

I have Borderline Personality Disorder and I'm married to a wonderful man who I love. I have a blog that discusses my warped mind in detail:

"You Know You're Borderline When…" | Jaen Wirefly, LMSW
Wow, you are an author too.. what does "LMSW" mean?

I am sure you could help a lot of people here on this forum who have struggles in this area ... I've seen BPD mentioned many times..

My results:

11 Acts Of Service, 8 Quality Time, 5 Words Of Affirmation, 2 Gifts, and 4 Physical Touch!
So you love when he helps you around the house & shows his love by "doing"/ actions - and spending time with him is important.

Now I'm sure your curious to learn of his order also . :)
 

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Wow, you are an author too.. what does "LMSW" mean?

I am sure you could help a lot of people here on this forum who have struggles in this area ... I've seen BPD mentioned many times..

So you love when he helps you around the house & shows his love by "doing"/ actions - and spending time with him is important.

Now I'm sure your curious to learn of his order also . :)
LMSW = Licensed Masters of Social Work (I have a Masters in Social Work and I'm licensed to practice in my state.)

I never realized that my husband doing stuff around the house is so important to me. When he vacuums and cooks me dinner it makes me so happy - and I make sure to let him know.
 

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1. Stay Fit
2. Keep up appearance (hair/makeup/clothing)
3. Stay positive
4. Lots of flirting (touching, texting, sexual innuendo)
5. Time together TALKING (like when you're dating)
6. Sex and intimacy (close cuddling/touching)
7. Telling him how much I appreciate what he does for me and our family

Here's the interesting thing. When I do these things, in return he keeps doing the things that I love and appreciate. If I slack, he slacks and it all starts unraveling.

I think (and I'm definitely not a pro) that a lot of marriages derail when one or both partners sort of give up on doing the little things that made their spouse fall in love with them. That's definitely what had happened for us. After 10 years, we had stopped doing most of those things on that list and nearly destroyed our marriage.
 

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1. Stay Fit
2. Keep up appearance (hair/makeup/clothing)
3. Stay positive
4. Lots of flirting (touching, texting, sexual innuendo)
5. Time together TALKING (like when you're dating)
6. Sex and intimacy (close cuddling/touching)
7. Telling him how much I appreciate what he does for me and our family

Here's the interesting thing. When I do these things, in return he keeps doing the things that I love and appreciate. If I slack, he slacks and it all starts unraveling.

I think (and I'm definitely not a pro) that a lot of marriages derail when one or both partners sort of give up on doing the little things that made their spouse fall in love with them. That's definitely what had happened for us. After 10 years, we had stopped doing most of those things on that list and nearly destroyed our marriage.
You are sooo right! I get frustrated in my marriage when all we do are chores and fight about extended family. But I've noticed when I call him at work just to tell him "I miss him" and look into his eyes and tell him "I love him" things begin to get better. He becomes more romantic and we laugh and start to have fun together. Marriage doesn't really need "work" just care and feeding.
 

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LMSW = Licensed Masters of Social Work (I have a Masters in Social Work and I'm licensed to practice in my state.)
Nice ...Impressive ....


I never realized that my husband doing stuff around the house is so important to me. When he vacuums and cooks me dinner it makes me so happy - and I make sure to let him know.
It's funny we may not even know what we are -until we take a test... Even our kids have these same Love languages....which stays with them as we grow into adulthood... I can pretty much tell what my kids are .. by how they light up - in certain areas........

I have the book The Five Love Languages of Children:


When I was growing up, my family were not big touchers (at least not with me)... I had a step Mom -she never did my hair or anything, no hugging - I didn't feel so loved at home.... but me & my best friend would scratch each other backs, stuff like that... we were very close.

Then I met my bf/now husband, he was always very touchy feely - running his fingers through my hair, scratching my back, reaching for my hand....I felt LOVED from the get go... and he loved spending TIME with me, we did everything together, I knew nothing about these love languages back then... but yet... I felt overwhelmingly loved by him since we met - due to his being this way....we tend to DO & express what we are (and want in return).....

The only thing I didn't connect was - his need for more SEX... I was getting 'filled" with all the "touch" of our babies (
x6), sleeping with them in between us, holding them, he was still running his fingers through my hair like every night while we watched movies together on the couch...

I think I needed a BRICK to my head back then.


He was TOO QUIET about his own needs. I get it now!!

It is good to learn of these things early on in a marriage !!
 
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