I really don't want to have to lay my entire life on the line here, but feel we are all pretty much in the same boat if we are turning to complete strangers to help us decide our lives fate??!! I have been married for 18 years. I got married at 19, WAY too young. I grew up in a small town, going out, dating, getting drunk is what you did; then? The next step? Get married. Next thing you know? You are pregnant...time marches on, and the next thing you know? WHAT IN THE H--- have I done! I never was "in love" with this man, it was infatuation! I truly didn't know what "love" is anyway. Next thing I know, I have 2 children, and here we are. I am not in love at all, he is. I may sound terrible to anyone out there who does not understand my life, and that's ok-we all have our opinions. My problem now, is I have had an affair, 2 actually, and he found out about one-that was my "hope" to get out, but he wouldn't let me go. I don't want to keep doing that, or being attracted to other men out there; because believe it or not? I do have morals. The hurt I have caused him goes on and on. He knows I don't love him, how awful that I have to tell him that weekly, its killing him. I want to seperate, but just can't decide or be at peace as to what to do. He and I are "friends" but when it comes to love, kissing, making love? My gut is sick at the thought. Is there anyone out there with any advice for me, or in the same boat? I believe God doesn't want divorce, but does God want someone to remain in a marriage, where both partners are equally unhappy?