Hello,
So the past 5 years of my marraige have been good sometimes and horrible at others. I'm not perfect and I don't want to come as I am. A little about me. I'm a recovering alcoholic, from an alcoholic household. Didn't have many friends growing 3-4 at the most. Don't like crowds. I do many things like paying the bills, setting up appointments (because my wife didn't like doing it).
About 5 years I got I was paying my cellphone bill and I notice we had data charges. We didn't have a data plan on our cell phone package. So, I looked an notice pictures being sent back and forth a one phone number. So, I confronted my wife and she stated it was from a fellow co-worker who happened to be her boss. I had met him and knew him pretty well, or so I thought. I'm in the military, and at that time I was gone for a few day at a time. I also began to be depressed, I didn't like my work situation, and I turned to my old friend. Alcohol. I was also doing a lot of gaming during this time. My wife would try to get me to do things, I just didn't want to. So, I know my actions pushed her away. My wife was talking to this man, behind closed doors, and texting him all day everyday. There was about 6,000 text messages back and forth. I called our phone company and they stated the pictures were saved online. They gave me the account information and logged in... I was torn apart. My wife and this man had sent nude photos back and forth. So, I packed all her stuff up set it by the door, and said get out, and find a new place to live.
So, she cried and begged and pleaded to stay. Things were ok for about 2 weeks. I came home walked in the door and she said she wanted a divorce. So, I left. One night, she had been out partying and called me and told me to come home. So, I did. We started marraige counseling for the next 6 months without one fight or problem. I didn't drink during this whole period. I was proud of myself. Then the reality of my profession came swooping in with different ideas. I would be deployed, for time in excess of 5-6 month. We decide she would stay with her family that way she would be by herself. After, I left the first time, she had contacted the man before. I was mad. I'd had enough and she cried and showed me everything. I left for 3 months, she send me emails and tell me she loved me and how important I was. Things were good for about a year and half. She currently goes to college. So, before I got back she told me she had been talking to a person who was helping her "wake up". Being I'm not in the situation, not at home, I'm thinking the worse. I could hear it in her voice. You know when you know, and I knew. But, the funny thing is, it wasnt this person at all. He's actually helping her. He actually on my team, I was suprised. A little after I left, she had started playing a game on the computer, and men started messaging her. So, she would have internet sex with about 5-6 people during the month before I got home. Pictures, messages, and all that. There's nothing worse than hearing you wife, tell another man she wishes it was them. She even did it the night before I got home. I was floored. I also found that one of her professors had been texting and calling her. I dusted my self off, got ready to go the airport. She stopped me. I asked her why she did this, she said loneliness, and then said she doesn't know. Then she told me she had been molested, and pictures were taken of her at a young age by another man. This struck me. I've been seeing a counselor myself for anxiety attacks, and just to have a place to go to talk. I explained this to my counselor, and she said it makes sense. She goes from one side (loving me), to (sending nude photos) the other side. I've been with here for 11 years. I don't want to give up, but, the molesting and pictures of her, was the first I've heard of it. I said, "I'm getting professional help and heres the number, you can try it" She give me a bunch of reason why she shouldn't. She just wants to talk to the one person. I also asked her if she's ever had any physical contact with another man or woman. She says no, I'm not buying it. I'm I wrong for that? I'll appreciate and helpful insight.
