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Parents need to be teaching the kids manners and it doesn't get much more basic than saying please and thank you and I just don't think that's too much to ask. I mean if you're not teaching your kids please and thank you what on Earth are you teaching them?
I don’t disagree, but maybe Dice’s DIL takes it upon herself to offer thanks due to distance. I’m sure if they all were in person, they’d all say thank you so this may just be a long distance “alternative.” Just guessing.
 

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I think

I think that women in general are better at that sort of thing than guys..
Yea, but I can also see the point being - how difficult is it for his adult son to simply send a text “thanks dad for the gifts.” I don’t know…

I have a feeling though he assumes it’s understood by his parents that they’re all thankful.
 

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This is true. Whenever we gift them in person, they always say thank you. So I guess it's a long distance thing. It's just that now, with current technology, how easy is it to just pick up their phone? It's not that we're asking for a hand written note in the mail. Kids text all day everyday about everything and they can't be bothered to text a thank you or hit one button in their contacts and actually voice it? I'll probably go along with the wife's wishes and keep sending gifts, but ingratitude still pisses me off. I may have a talk with my son when they visit for Christmas and tell him that if it wasn't for his mother, I'd cut him off.
Does your son ever call you just to see how you’re doing or text? Do you have a good relationship with him, overall?
 

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If you have an otherwise good relationship, then I’d let it go. I honestly think your son believes it’s understood that the whole family appreciates these gifts with your DIL sending one message/thank you card. You’re not “wrong” to feel as you do, but it’s not worth costing your good relationship over this one issue. Just my opinion, anyway.
 
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