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i'm a us soldier from a deployment. while i was gone, my wife went through some changes that i feel has left me out in the cold. she is a young, beatiful, 24 year old red head that has discovered what the 20's are about. she had gotten interested in going out and drinking with friends that she had met in school. well her pattern has been to the point of fustration. the past week the has gone out 4 times. now one of those times was with me and it was an incredible fun filled night. however, 2 nights were a surprise cause she went out after school and didn't come home until after 1 a.m. drunk!!!. i didn't have any idea where she was at nor did she return my calls when i was worried at midnight. yesterday we want out to go shopping and was a good day. that evening around 10:30 p.m. she wanted to go out with her friends. i said fine but pointed out that it was late. she made me feel giulty for changing her mind. i tried to make it up to her by getting movies and making a few drinks just to spend time together, but that wasn't good enough to her. her heart was set on going out. around 11:30 pm, she asked me if she could go out, and i said fine just stay in contact with me so i don't woory myself to sick again!!! she was cool with that and even gave the old lets have sex when she gets back. well she finally made it home around 4 am. she did stay in contact, but i didn't expect the 4am however. she said well have sex in the mourning cause her head was spinning. now its the mourning and she blew me off like i was crazy wanting to make out with my wife. now is it me or is there something i'm not seeing or worring myself to death over nothing. now i have confronted her about cheating and she has assured me that she is not and i believe her. i just feel that the ime for me and my wife is slowly getting replaced by her freinds. she is a mother by day, student by night and now a partier in to the wee hours of the mourning. where is the wife at???:confused:
 

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Well you didn't say what your age is so I cannot tell you that your age difference may have finally revealed some issues.

One of the problems with long separations, regardless of the reason, is that people develop separate lives. YOu might try counseling if you are going to be at home from now on, and ths phase might run its course and die out. If you cannot live this way, though, you need to let her know so that the two of you can decide what should happen next.
 

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If she were the man of the family everyone here would jump up about how selfish she is being, how destructive (money and herself) how the alcoholism is effecting you and any kids. How you should not be treated as bad as you are etc.

Flat out tell her to get help, straiten out or get out of this abusive (verbal & mental) relationship.

draconis
 
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