[charmbee]

The problem: I have been having a very hard time accepting his relationship with his boss, what bothers me most is that she got emotionally attached to my husband more than he did. She has sent him emails how much she dislike him and wished to disappear from him and even called him an *******. He drafted an email to her in his work email with his side of the story. All of this happening while we are patching things up. I felt the old feelings of distrust come back and now I can't work past it. I feel as if I am self destructing and destroying my relationship due to my actions. It is mind f*cking (excuse my french) to know that he still sees her every day. I had told him several times he needed to find a job. He also told me that he told her about me finding out about them. He told her that they need to refrain from any contact and she told him she would try to find another job. I can't seem to just forget about it, it's draining me mentally and physically, I rarely smile or go out anymore. I feel like this situation has gotten the best of me. I know it happened before we got back together but the fact that they ended whatever relationship they had not too long ago, I feel like I can't work on this relationship until i know she is no longer in the picture or either one of them move out of the work place. My main concern now is how can I learn to deal with this situation. I feel like this situation has gotten so big, bigger than me. I could no longer cope, I'm always moody and never know what will set me off next. I do want my marriage to work but until I can find some way to move pass this , I don't think it will work.
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[mrmark]

I'm so sorry, charmbee. I can definitely relate to the feeling of total exhaustion. It is so draining to put so much effort and faith into someone to have it fall down on you.

Do you think your husband is ernest in trying to sever all ties? Maybe some sincerity in that field would give you some peace of mind.

 

[Chris Taylor]

I think it's reasonable to not be able to move forward while there is still contact between the two of them.

Part of the issue is that in today's economy, it's hard to find another job and no one is going to leave one job without having another to go to.

Is there an internal transfer that could be done to alleviate the tension? Work from home?

 

[DayDream]

I think it's reasonable to not be able to move forward while there is still contact between the two of them.

Part of the issue is that in today's economy, it's hard to find another job and no one is going to leave one job without having another to go to.

Is there an internal transfer that could be done to alleviate the tension? Work from home?

That's why I wonder why people put their jobs in jeapardy over a fling or inappropriate behavior in the office/workplace. Then the axe falls and you're stuck there because finding another job is hard.