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Discussion Starter #1
Just need some validation here...

If a wife is talking, texing, and sending pictures (nothing nude, just her wearing different outfits like dresses, shorts, shirts) to one of her male "friends", is there really cheating?

My wife has sent me some pictures, like her making a funny face, or of her blowing me a kiss. But never of what she is wearing. Also, when we talk on the phone, its usually about 10 mins. Never a 50-70 minute phone call like with her male "friend".
 

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Just need some validation here...

If a wife is talking, texing, and sending pictures (nothing nude, just her wearing different outfits like dresses, shorts, shirts) to one of her male "friends", is there really cheating?

My wife has sent me some pictures, like her making a funny face, or of her blowing me a kiss. But never of what she is wearing. Also, when we talk on the phone, its usually about 10 mins. Never a 50-70 minute phone call like with her male "friend".
Cheating is an elastic term. Is she hiding it from you or is she out in the open?
 

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I'm amazed you're really asking this question? How about this, whats the number of suggestive pictures, text and calls you got during the same period? Also, did she tell you she sent them to him?

CHEATING!!!
 

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Can anyone, and i mean anyone, find me a valid reason for a woman to be sending pictures of herself (not family like pics) to another male other than her husband if not for obvious professional reasons?

What function may it serve that doesn't lead to something unfriendly to the marriage? I'm at lost at trying to find a plausible justification...
 

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Whats your instinct telling you?

I think our gut feeling tells us so much in these situations.

Did she hide anything she text-ed to him from you?
 

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There's no question here, friend. It's cheating, plain and simple. She can try to justify it any number of ways- but they would be just that- attempts at justifaction. daisy said it, Costa said it... everyone except those trying to be contrary will agree... it's cheating, it's not okay and it is harmful (and for some, perhaps irreparably so) to any marriage or relationship.
 

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Dude...you said in your other thread that you told her you saw the naked pics (which you admit to us was a lie, that you never saw any)... BUT SHE DIDN'T DENY IT! She never said "No you didn't! I never sent any!"... Now, given THAT information... yes, she was very much involved in an EA at the very least. But, you already know this...
 

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That depends. Did she tell you she was doing so and why? Did you tell her you're OK with it?
No, I never knew she was sending them to a guy. When I first saw some of the pictures of her in different outfits, and found out she had sent them to her male friend, her justification was that she also sent them to her best friend.

As in my other thread, she said she thinks of this guy as a brother.
 

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My FWH had a full blown sexting affair.

It started with a former coworker texting him to see if she could use him as a reference. From there it went to friendly chats, and then she sent a pic of herself...possibly what I would've called "innocent"...but with a bit of cleavage. From there, (ya know, since I didn't give him enough sex and attention), he came back with something like - "You look great, would look better without the shirt"...
And bam. A day later, the pix came in, and from there it was GAME ON.

If what you refer to isn't cheating....it's the very seed upon which it can grow.
 

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My FWH had a full blown sexting affair.

It started with a former coworker texting him to see if she could use him as a reference. From there it went to friendly chats, and then she sent a pic of herself...possibly what I would've called "innocent"...but with a bit of cleavage. From there, (ya know, since I didn't give him enough sex and attention), he came back with something like - "You look great, would look better without the shirt"...
And bam. A day later, the pix came in, and from there it was GAME ON.

If what you refer to isn't cheating....it's the very seed upon which it can grow.
I completely agree, its the planted seed, the beginning of something not so innocent and do you feel this in your gut?
 

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No, I never knew she was sending them to a guy. When I first saw some of the pictures of her in different outfits, and found out she had sent them to her male friend, her justification was that she also sent them to her best friend.

As in my other thread, she said she thinks of this guy as a brother.
READ THIS BOOK! Seriously. It says everything I want to.

Dr. Shirley Glass - NOT "Just Friends"
 

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No, I never knew she was sending them to a guy. When I first saw some of the pictures of her in different outfits, and found out she had sent them to her male friend, her justification was that she also sent them to her best friend.

As in my other thread, she said she thinks of this guy as a brother.
Does she have a brother? If yes, did he get the pictures as well?? Sorry OP, this one sounds like your getting BS from her.

Good luck
WD
 

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Does she have a brother? If yes, did he get the pictures as well?? Sorry OP, this one sounds like your getting BS from her.

Good luck
WD
No, she has no brother or sisters. But, she is very close to her best friend and considers her a sister. She said that her friend considers this guy her little brother (they have worked together for over 5 years). The pattern I found is that anyone that is close to her friend, she also had to get close to.

Makes no sense to me...
 

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Does she have a brother? If yes, did he get the pictures as well?? Sorry OP, this one sounds like your getting BS from her.

Good luck
WD
The only guys to receive your wifes pics of outfits should be her brothers.... seriously, what if you started getting pictures of other women in outfits they go out, obviously not catholic school uniforms, that would make you second guess the actual nature or purpose of receiving those messages.

Is this other man's opinion better than yours?! Does she need his approval to wear something, his praise, his compliment to feel good and secure about the clothes she has/bought?

This is inappropriate, forget good or bad, it is simply inappropriate and leads to further inappropriateness. She wants opinions of how her outfits look, she can ask you or her female friends but some other guy.....

In the back of your mind you know this is inappropriate whether she is attracted to OM or not it does not matter because you DO NOT know what OM's intentions are, or what could happen between them in the future, maybe he is a far away pen pal found from an online scenario.

Look into how many times a guy has slept with a girl he has no interest in, or how many times a woman has slept with a guy she has no interest. That doesn't even include emotions or friendship. Without even including alcohol, something new, exciting and thrilling like an affair addictive regardless of who it is with, and entertaining the idea or allowing a possibility to PRY through is a BIG RISK.
 
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