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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I came home to find that my wife opened my mail.

Is anything private or is everything open to all inthe relationship?
 

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I think that depends on the couple. Does your wife know that you don't want her to open up mail with only your name on it? I don't think this needs to be turned into a big thing; just some boundaries being set.
As for my husband and I, we don't really have any boundaries when it comes to mail. I stay out of my hubby's wallet though I don't have to; it's more of a respect thing I like to give him. Same thing with my hubby and my purse.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I actually told her not to open it & she opened it anyway even though she knew what it was before she opened it because I told her before it got there. I don't care about my wallet, there is no money in it, she has it all. (lol)

Not that there needs to be secrets but, is anything private or everything is her business? I respect her privaxy.
 

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I think that depends on the couple. Does your wife know that you don't want her to open up mail with only your name on it? I don't think this needs to be turned into a big thing; just some boundaries being set.
As for my husband and I, we don't really have any boundaries when it comes to mail. I stay out of my hubby's wallet though I don't have to; it's more of a respect thing I like to give him. Same thing with my hubby and my purse.
I agree with molly here, NO ONE and i mean NO ONE is allowed to dig in my purse. that is my personal private space. and the same goes for his wallet.

as far as the mail thing, have yall talked about it? set boundaries? my hubby and i never expressed if it ok to open one antohers mail. It is just a given that he dont open mine and i dont open his except for expressed verbal consent saying that it is ok. I agree its more of a respect thing. I am not trying to hide anything or any of that.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
The only discussion had was her tellingme that since we were married that she thought that everything was open between us. If she would had listened to me & not opened it, I would not be so riled up about it. She already knew what it was.

I fear going into women's purses so whenever any woman says just go into my purse, I immediately bring it to them.
 

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I Don't know that is a couple Issue, but me and my wife share everything and NOTHING is off limits, She even knows my passwords for E-mail and etc, she can check it anytime if she wants to. She taks money out of my wallet, I take it out of hers, The kids take it out of both...lol

But I open all the mail even in her name, because I handle all the bills, not becuase I "have to" but because she does not want to be bothered paying them, I handle them all electronically anyway, She handles the "spending" portion :p

Anyway, in my marriage, everything is open and nothing is private....we have nothing to hide from each other.
 

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Yeah, us either... we open each other's mail. He checks my email and even goes through my sent and deleted emails. I know his passwords. I could go through his wallet if I needed something, but generally I stay away from it and would rather bring it to him just b/c I don't want to be responsible for losing anything. He will get in my purse if he needs something. But as for the mail... he doesn't handle paperwork very well, or rather not at all, so it's my duty to file it or pitch it or whatever, so I may as well just do it when it comes. It's just that we have nothing to hide from one another.

As for you specifically telling your wife not to open your mail... I guess she should have respected your request. If my husband told me not to open something, I wouldn't.
 

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I handle the bills at our house, but if there is something that doesn't look like a bill, then I don't open it. He's never gotten upset about it or said I couldn't, I just try to respect his privacy. He rarely opens the mail, but has before. It's not a big deal to us.

We do stay out of each other's wallet/purse as well, but I don't thin either one of us would care if the other was in it.
 

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I came home to find that my wife opened my mail.

Is anything private or is everything open to all inthe relationship?
With the wife and I we have little personal space, I tell her to go through my mail all the time and sometimes have her log into an e-mail account because I need information from it. She has no problem with me and she doesn't own a purse. I rarely have to go into her e-mail or mail but since I set up her e-mail , myspace etc I guess I could if I wanted to just never really felt the need to.

Each couple has to be comfortable with their own boundries.

draconis
 
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