I don't think so. I think if he is not around it'll only make things worse as we're not repairing anything, working on anything or even spending time together. I feel in some ways i've checked out because of this..almost like I'm a single parent anyway, or I do everything on my own anyway.
You know what though, I feel though that in some ways I kinda let him decide because I feel forcing him to do something is like making him do something he doesn't want and that's not genuine..I don't know, I mean is it normal to feel that way?
I hate that I have to make him do things..I feel like this will only make it worse..I don't know...but that is also why I've been a doormat all these years and I am not willing to live like that anymore.
He sold left over metal from some work project they did together.
He's not doing anything to prove he only did it once..He says he doesn't know what to do to get me to understand him, to trust him that it only happened once..only thing he's done is swear by his kids, mom and deceased sister that it was only once.
I feel like what I need to do is tell him I need:
-a peaceful home
-ABSOLUTELY NO SCREAMING (at me or the kids)
-and affection, although sometimes I don't feel like it..it feels fake
So tell him that. Unless he is willing to do whatever it takes, at least in the short run, I doubt things can work. If you've been a doormat all these years, then now is the time to stop. Stand up for what you need.
Once he's proven he's committed, THEN you can work on your marriage together. Right now it doesn't sound like much of a marriage, really, with him walking all over you.
Have you poked around the forum here and read a bunch in CWI?