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Discussion Starter #22
Glad you are rid of her. You will feel better once you start dating a good woman!

The business idea is great. Our friends that did this had to rent equipment at first and then buy the pieces slowly (geez they are expensive!) but now they are set. If your property has a lot of equity, you could possibly do what you said and move into a much smaller place in the meantime, or perhaps do a home equity line of credit to get your equipment.

You are going to do great. Forget her, you have a bright future. Now have fun planning and living it!
I intend to rent some equipment, but certainly want to have at least one piece of personal equipment to start with, plus the means to haul it safely. My current truck would haul a mini ex, but it wouldn't enjoy it.
 

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Just be careful about incurring debts. I believe there can be a wise use of credit, but my own personal view of debt wisdom allows much fewer instances than some others.

I'm not familiar with the business you are planning, so I don't know how depreciation applies to the equipment you will need.

If you decide to gain experience by working in the trade, make sure that it's in another town or area where your business will not be seen as a competitor by your employer.
 

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Discussion Starter #24
Just be careful about incurring debts. I believe there can be a wise use of credit, but my own personal view of debt wisdom allows much fewer instances than some others.

I'm not familiar with the business you are planning, so I don't know how depreciation applies to the equipment you will need.

If you decide to gain experience by working in the trade, make sure that it's in another town or area where your business will not be seen as a competitor by your employer.
The depreciation on heavy equipment where I'm located is typically 10 years. I do have the option to incur the entire expense on my taxes in the year of purchase, but that wouldn't be very helpful starting out.

It is always best to keep debt minimal unless you have an opportunity to leverage it into greater profit. In my instance, I intend to avoid it entirely until I'm established and have an idea of my profitability. My plan on what equipment to purchase after the first piece may different by the time I get that far down the road. I'm flexible. I just want to carve out my own little niche at first and expand as applicable.

Not having to hire a CPA or financial planner will cut out some overhead. Lol.
 

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Discussion Starter #25
I'm struggling with the idea of selling a show car to help start funding things and get moving sooner than later. Problem is, I've spent nearly a decade restoring it by hand. I got the car from my father. He is still alive and well, but still. I probably have 4,000 hours in this car.
 

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Just an update on the wife:

Yesterday, she caught her most recent man cheating on her with his ex. That's 2 in a row for her now. She messaged me yesterday and said "Karma is a *****."

She had no idea I knew who the second man was.
Make sure you dont answer her when she sends you crap like this. No contact.
 

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As I tell my clients, hate is good in a situation like this. Hate gives you strength and keeps up your resolve to see this through and come out the other side with what's best for you and your daughter. Keep up that hate until this whole thing is over.
 

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To operate the dump and pull a large equipment trailer, I will need my cdl.
I was previously in the military, and have ran much larger trucks, so I'm not worried at all about operating a small dump.


I've used mini excavators, ditch witches, and skid steers in the past. No licenses are needed to operate any of this equipment.

I haven't ran a backhoe, but controls are relatively the same depending on the model.


It slows down in winter, but isn't seasonal work such as mowing. Water lines, etc, burst more often in the winter, and construction goes on year round. This is one reason I would like to get a model with a cab on it.


There are some large operators in my area, but there are not many smaller outfits. I can operate with a much lower overhead cost than these 25+ dump truck operations and take smaller residential jobs they typically avoid. I've got 2 friends with some equipment and each operates within his own niche. One of my friends is a one man operation with a dozer, who will certainly refer work my way. Another of my friends is a plumber with a mini ex, but has no way to haul material off as that typically isn't needed in his business. When he digs a hole, he fills it back in.

There are always risks of giving up a financially secure job, but I like to think I've done a decent risk analysis and hit it from all angles. I'm typically an over-thinker.
Your plumber buddy with the mini ex, does he use it frequently? Maybe he'd be willing to rent it to you when he's not using it. If you can buy one cash cheap, or cheap for an excavator, that would be better than renting but if you can't buy you can still start your business renting.

Can you repair this stuff yourself? Weld up a damaged bucket? Are you in an area with rocky soil where you'd need a hammer on most jobs? What do excavators go for in your area? I'm just curious about this, I really like your idea.
 

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Discussion Starter #29
Make sure you dont answer her when she sends you crap like this. No contact.
No contact isn't really a good option. We keep open communication about our 3 year old. I try to ignore her about most other things. Usually I'm successful. I do like to hear when things aren't working out as she planned however.
 

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Sir, I did not need to read too deeply into your post to realize that a) you were blindsided b) you are deadly depressed. This is endemic to the trauma that your exWW heaped upon you from left field. You don't know it, but you have been in a traumatic situation. Now, first, you are now reassessing your life, your wants and your needs. Do not do anything until you have started therapy. I know, I deal with a good number of people who were blindsided by their spouse's infidelity or at minimum, their want to end the marriage. You are shocky, and that is ok. Make no life decisions until you are on firmer footing. Don't quit the job. Don't move. AND for god's sake, hands off the ex and her little circle of screwy.

You need to know that it gets better. You need to know that she threw you over for less. You need to know that if you mind your own knitting, things will get better. Read a few of the posts in Considering Divorce, under "Those who moved through it...". There are a few like yourself. One whose wife just wanted to test the waters of an affair, and was going to come back. Too bad he divorced her, found another, improved his life and watched hers turn to a pile of dingleberries.
 

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No contact isn't really a good option. We keep open communication about our 3 year old. I try to ignore her about most other things. Usually I'm successful. I do like to hear when things aren't working out as she planned however.
Of course you have to coparent. And of course you love to hear the failures, lol, just make sure you laugh it up to yourself and dont respond. :grin2:
 

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Discussion Starter #32
Your plumber buddy with the mini ex, does he use it frequently? Maybe he'd be willing to rent it to you when he's not using it. If you can buy one cash cheap, or cheap for an excavator, that would be better than renting but if you can't buy you can still start your business renting.

Can you repair this stuff yourself? Weld up a damaged bucket? Are you in an area with rocky soil where you'd need a hammer on most jobs? What do excavators go for in your area? I'm just curious about this, I really like your idea.
He uses it frequently enough. I might be able to borrow it in a pinch, but I doubt it could be a regular thing.

I want to buy a used one with relatively low hours in the 6500 lb to 7000 lb range..with a cab.. I've been looking and that range is anywhere between $15,000 and $20,000. I could start with an older one in the much cheaper range, but don't really want a high maintenance time bomb. Could rent one for $250+ a day, but that really gives me a very small margin to try and make money on. It's not too feasible part time starting out. If I was lined solid with work and already full time, renting a larger or smaller one for the job I need would be way more doable.

I've been an aircraft mechanic and restore old cars as time permits. I have a welder, garage, etc. I can fix most things. I don't have a lot of experience working on hydraulic systems, but enough mechanical experience that I'm not terribly worried about it. I can replace a pump or a seal as needed. In the down time with one machine will be another scenario in which I'd have to rent once I go full time, at least until I can afford more equipment.

We have clay/ partially rocky soil. I have seen a few mini exes with the hammer attachment. I don't believe I'd need it on most jobs. Can dig most of it. There are some areas where it would definitely save time, plus it would give me more flexibility. The hammer attachments typically go for 4 to 5k. If I don't swing one with my initial purchase, that's another rental scenario.
 

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He uses it frequently enough. I might be able to borrow it in a pinch, but I doubt it could be a regular thing.

I want to buy a used one with relatively low hours in the 6500 lb to 7000 lb range..with a cab.. I've been looking and that range is anywhere between $15,000 and $20,000. I could start with an older one in the much cheaper range, but don't really want a high maintenance time bomb. Could rent one for $250+ a day, but that really gives me a very small margin to try and make money on. It's not too feasible part time starting out. If I was lined solid with work and already full time, renting a larger or smaller one for the job I need would be way more doable.

I've been an aircraft mechanic and restore old cars as time permits. I have a welder, garage, etc. I can fix most things. I don't have a lot of experience working on hydraulic systems, but enough mechanical experience that I'm not terribly worried about it. I can replace a pump or a seal as needed. In the down time with one machine will be another scenario in which I'd have to rent once I go full time, at least until I can afford more equipment.

We have clay/ partially rocky soil. I have seen a few mini exes with the hammer attachment. I don't believe I'd need it on most jobs. Can dig most of it. There are some areas where it would definitely save time, plus it would give me more flexibility. The hammer attachments typically go for 4 to 5k. If I don't swing one with my initial purchase, that's another rental scenario.
Nice. Might want to check out Andrew Camarata on youtube.

 

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Discussion Starter #34
Sir, I did not need to read too deeply into your post to realize that a) you were blindsided b) you are deadly depressed. This is endemic to the trauma that your exWW heaped upon you from left field. You don't know it, but you have been in a traumatic situation. Now, first, you are now reassessing your life, your wants and your needs. Do not do anything until you have started therapy. I know, I deal with a good number of people who were blindsided by their spouse's infidelity or at minimum, their want to end the marriage. You are shocky, and that is ok. Make no life decisions until you are on firmer footing. Don't quit the job. Don't move. AND for god's sake, hands off the ex and her little circle of screwy.

You need to know that it gets better. You need to know that she threw you over for less. You need to know that if you mind your own knitting, things will get better. Read a few of the posts in Considering Divorce, under "Those who moved through it...". There are a few like yourself. One whose wife just wanted to test the waters of an affair, and was going to come back. Too bad he divorced her, found another, improved his life and watched hers turn to a pile of dingleberries.

I'm not quitting the job for at least some time. I'm still saving, and this will take quite a while. But changing careers is far from a new plan. This "temporary" career has turned into a 9 year run, and I'm ready to move on and make it happen. Not really related to her, other than I now have more free time to think about it and pursue it.

I do like the idea of moving, but with my current location, the value of my home is expected to grow quite a bit. It's in a high demand area and very few houses are available. This house was a compromise when we bought it, and now I'm stuck with the things she wanted. I'm not moving any time in the immediate future.

I've never been too keen on the idea of therapy...unless it's spending the weekend on a beach with a case of beer.
 

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I'm ready to move on and make it happen. Not really related to her, other than I now have more free time to think about it and pursue it.
I think you're executing on a sensible plan and I expect over the next few years I'll hear of your success. You have an excellent skillset behind you. You are thinking clearly and rationally. I also expect to hear that you have leveraged all those aspects of your background to reach your goals.

This time can be converted from a $hit$andwich into a time where you moved into a long-contemplated career. Congratulations on remaining level-headed and directionally stable.
 

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Whatever you do, never let your schlong near her nasty cooter again. Don’t ever drink around her, or put yourself in a situation that your guard is down and you may accept an offer for sex. I know you say never, but I’m here to remind you for good measure. It’s hard to turn down sex after all. >:)
 

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Your wife is a serial cheater and is never going to be a candidate for anything but a side piece.

Make sure you fix your picker when you do start dating. Try to find one with a more normal background. She seems to like the bad boys instead of accountants.

I would go for full custody if you are concerned about your daughter. Your wife is going to be bringing some pretty bad characters around her. Depending on the state you live in, its a pretty tough battle though. She is probably a drug user herself.
 

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I'm not in terrible shape. I've lifted pretty steadily for a few years now, much stronger than years ago.

I gave up running due to a bad knee. I just packed on a few pounds from when we met the first time a decade ago.

But, I'm probably 20 pounds lighter right now than when we last started dating again 5 years ago, before we got married etc. When we met way back when I was a skinny young punk with a 6 pack at 130 lbs. Currently, I've got about 25 lbs to lose and I will have a 6 pack at 150ish lbs. I'm only 5 8'. I've put on a bit of muscle. I would just like to get lean and see my abs again.
I had to start a therapy approach to lifting and treadmill time since I was injured in a 2nd. job trying to keep up with bills and such. And while I did tone up the chest and get the arms alot bigger. I have improved my mile times while running, and my BP is back on track.

The sideline is that there are plenty of females that will want companionship and be hawking around. That WILL put the mojo back in your step. Also, if your old hobbies don't interest you anymore, get new ones. Be sure to step out of your comfort zone and try things that you think you may not like but won't make you absolutely miserable. You may just find something and someone to redirect your attention....Good luck.
 

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Discussion Starter #40
I had to start a therapy approach to lifting and treadmill time since I was injured in a 2nd. job trying to keep up with bills and such. And while I did tone up the chest and get the arms alot bigger. I have improved my mile times while running, and my BP is back on track.

The sideline is that there are plenty of females that will want companionship and be hawking around. That WILL put the mojo back in your step. Also, if your old hobbies don't interest you anymore, get new ones. Be sure to step out of your comfort zone and try things that you think you may not like but won't make you absolutely miserable. You may just find something and someone to redirect your attention....Good luck.
So far I'm not seeing any of these females hawking around. It's kind of strange. It used to not be such a problem. I could send a message and be doing something that night with one girl and something else the next morning with another. I guess age happened.
 
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