[Snookums]

Just curious for feed back on a situation, I'll try to make al ong story short:

My fiances parents never had a relationship with his 1st wife while they were together for 11 years, actually the parents couldn't stand her from the day he brought her home. No holidays or birthday celebrations were ever celebrated together. If fiance wanted to see hsi family for a holiday he had to do it by himself because ex would refuse to see family (ex & parents hatred for each other was mutual on both sides)

Not until after he finally decided to divorce her the ex & parents decided to bond together. Honestly the family is not of a stable or normal background what so ever. But anyway the family decided to side with ex now and become friendly, actually ex & parents worked together to keep fiances children from him for 2 years.

Fast forward: after a few years of turmoil with the parents fiance is now having a civil/good relationship with the family (suposedly issues have been resolved & buried) everyone wants a new start so the beginning of a new healthy relationship is suppose to be happening but my questions is this..................

How can fiance & myself have a new healthy relationship with the parents when they insist on keeping the ex involved with our lives? And what I mean by that is it is expected that we are to sit at a holiday dinner table & spend our holiday with the ex right there with us!!! How does this happen when the ex is once AGAIN bringing us back to court for more child support which is uncalled for (she tries this all the time because she feels fiance should hand over his entire paycheck to her)

Shouldn't the ex go spend the holidays with her family that live in the same damn town & let us have it with ours?? I believe she does this just to make sure that she knows & is involved with every aspect of our life.

There's so much more I need to vent about this situation but don't want to make this post too long, hopefully you all got the jist of this for now.

 

[Snookums]

Hmmmm that's what I thought.....this situation is so crewed up no one has advice lol

 

[Chris Taylor]

You suck it up.

It's the holidays and you show up with a smile on your face for the sake of his kids being with their mother, father and grandparents.

 

[Snookums]

Sorry but :rofl: I'd rather keep with their family tradition and not show up and let them have at it.

The 3 of them (ex, father & stepmom) have a long history of meeting together & plotting to cause drama & pain in the family. I choose not to have anything to do with it. I believe they do this ONLY to cause turmoil within the family!

Funny cause when the ex isn't around they are more then willing to talk badly about her as well and that is where I do step up and stop it in their tracks by telling them I am not there to discuss the ex, that she is part of my fiances past & that is where she will stay.

The family dynamic is evil and just makes me more thankful for my caring & loving family. But thanks for the input.

 

[daffodilly]

What does your fiance say about all this???

I think it should come from him....when the kids spend time with HIM, ex has her own free time. If you're in laws want to keep in touch with the ex, they are free to do so, on their own time. Your fiance should be the one enforcing this.