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2 Posts
I need to get this off my chest as I have been keeping it bottled in for a long time.
Bit of background been "married" for three years. Both the wife and I are 31. She is a highly successful medical professional and I am now unemployed as my area of study is pretty much jobless. I had been attending classes to switch to another profession but our caustic relationship eventually destroyed that. We have split up twice, both times with me leaving. Our fights are so disgusting that I had decided it was better for everyone to just leave. I am currently still not living with her which is where I find myself now.
We had been talking off and on and met up a few times. This involved sexual intercourse. She had decided to get off the birth control and I am really stupid not to have kept my pants on. I was still in the frame of mind of getting my own life in order before dealing with her and our marriage, but now there is a real strong possibility she is pregnant. She has always wanted kids and I have not, so needless to say she will have it. I can't honestly think of a worse thing to happen at this time. The problem is I can't just "man up" for the kid, because there is no work in this town that can just be found. My wife will not move under any circumstances. It looks like I am destined to be a dead beat dad, even though that is really that last failure I want on my shoulders. Even if the wife and I stayed together for the child it would eventually turn back into the living hell it was when I left, which please believe me was no place for a kid.
I guess thats enough rambling. I don't even know what advice could even help. I just know that this is without a doubt the worst I have ever felt in my entire life.
Bit of background been "married" for three years. Both the wife and I are 31. She is a highly successful medical professional and I am now unemployed as my area of study is pretty much jobless. I had been attending classes to switch to another profession but our caustic relationship eventually destroyed that. We have split up twice, both times with me leaving. Our fights are so disgusting that I had decided it was better for everyone to just leave. I am currently still not living with her which is where I find myself now.
We had been talking off and on and met up a few times. This involved sexual intercourse. She had decided to get off the birth control and I am really stupid not to have kept my pants on. I was still in the frame of mind of getting my own life in order before dealing with her and our marriage, but now there is a real strong possibility she is pregnant. She has always wanted kids and I have not, so needless to say she will have it. I can't honestly think of a worse thing to happen at this time. The problem is I can't just "man up" for the kid, because there is no work in this town that can just be found. My wife will not move under any circumstances. It looks like I am destined to be a dead beat dad, even though that is really that last failure I want on my shoulders. Even if the wife and I stayed together for the child it would eventually turn back into the living hell it was when I left, which please believe me was no place for a kid.
I guess thats enough rambling. I don't even know what advice could even help. I just know that this is without a doubt the worst I have ever felt in my entire life.