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Hello everyone, I am so happy I found this forum. I have been in the worst position and the lowest point in my life. Extremely long story so I will shorten it the most I can.
I met my fiance at work and it literally seemed love at first sight, we started hanging out together at work and she was just out of a relationship and i was leaving a bad one. We spent every moment together and were happy as can be for five years. A while into the relationship she told me she had something happen in her childhood and she has had relationship problems every since. I assured her we could work through it. She also told me she had no desire to have children, not that she didnt like them just better they could go home. After five years she told me we could have one shot at a baby and had her I.U.D taken out. during recovery we used condoms then on my birthday we tried. Used condoms every time after that until the test came back, she was pregnant. We had the baby and life was good until we got a bit behind on bills so we sold her house and moved to another state to see my family. We were there 13 months and sex was pretty much non existent at this time. When we moved back home we started drifting apart and things got bad. I had a huge house and moved a friend in so he had a place to stay on the weekends. This started causing more problems but I felt justified because of the lack of emotions she had been giving me. After some time she decided to move out and we could work on us separately. We started going to church and staying at her house frequently but after six months I started drinking incredible amounts and withdrew from her even more. Contact has pretty much been only about our son at this point and three months ago I really started to miss her and realize what we were doing but didnt know how to talk to her. September 1st we had a huge fight and I was so low I tried to shoot myself. I ended up in a Mental hospital for a week and came out on medicine but was poor medicine. I was paying bills one day and noticd a hone number that repeatedly showed in her call log so i checked into it and was an old male friend she knew before me. The day I went to the hospital she started regular calls to him and later I found he had stayed several nights. I scheduled to see her and my son on a sunday and she seemed so distant that I told her I had to go. After I left I checked her call log and seen she called him before i was to my truck so i waited and twenty min later he showed up. I literally lost my cool but nothing happened other than yelling. I went back to the hospital and changed medicine and quit drinking and feel better but miss her so bad. I have asked and pleaded many times and she insists she is done but doesnt know what will happen in the future. She insists there is nothing going on with him and he just needed a place to stay till his place is ready on the first and I nee to stop worrying about her and focus on getting my head straight. I cant stop thinking about her and when I see her or hear her it really hurts. The memories have flooded in and cant believe what has happened.
I am sorry I am sure I have left some of the story out but I do not know what to do at this point. I started today on the 180 after finding out what that was but would like reassurance and advise on what to do from here. I have even had the thought of kicking in her door early in the morning to verify if he is on the couch as she says or in bed with him like i assume. Guess its none of my business really. Sorry for the long read but thanks in advance
I met my fiance at work and it literally seemed love at first sight, we started hanging out together at work and she was just out of a relationship and i was leaving a bad one. We spent every moment together and were happy as can be for five years. A while into the relationship she told me she had something happen in her childhood and she has had relationship problems every since. I assured her we could work through it. She also told me she had no desire to have children, not that she didnt like them just better they could go home. After five years she told me we could have one shot at a baby and had her I.U.D taken out. during recovery we used condoms then on my birthday we tried. Used condoms every time after that until the test came back, she was pregnant. We had the baby and life was good until we got a bit behind on bills so we sold her house and moved to another state to see my family. We were there 13 months and sex was pretty much non existent at this time. When we moved back home we started drifting apart and things got bad. I had a huge house and moved a friend in so he had a place to stay on the weekends. This started causing more problems but I felt justified because of the lack of emotions she had been giving me. After some time she decided to move out and we could work on us separately. We started going to church and staying at her house frequently but after six months I started drinking incredible amounts and withdrew from her even more. Contact has pretty much been only about our son at this point and three months ago I really started to miss her and realize what we were doing but didnt know how to talk to her. September 1st we had a huge fight and I was so low I tried to shoot myself. I ended up in a Mental hospital for a week and came out on medicine but was poor medicine. I was paying bills one day and noticd a hone number that repeatedly showed in her call log so i checked into it and was an old male friend she knew before me. The day I went to the hospital she started regular calls to him and later I found he had stayed several nights. I scheduled to see her and my son on a sunday and she seemed so distant that I told her I had to go. After I left I checked her call log and seen she called him before i was to my truck so i waited and twenty min later he showed up. I literally lost my cool but nothing happened other than yelling. I went back to the hospital and changed medicine and quit drinking and feel better but miss her so bad. I have asked and pleaded many times and she insists she is done but doesnt know what will happen in the future. She insists there is nothing going on with him and he just needed a place to stay till his place is ready on the first and I nee to stop worrying about her and focus on getting my head straight. I cant stop thinking about her and when I see her or hear her it really hurts. The memories have flooded in and cant believe what has happened.
I am sorry I am sure I have left some of the story out but I do not know what to do at this point. I started today on the 180 after finding out what that was but would like reassurance and advise on what to do from here. I have even had the thought of kicking in her door early in the morning to verify if he is on the couch as she says or in bed with him like i assume. Guess its none of my business really. Sorry for the long read but thanks in advance