You are minimising what you did so early on too, you are not remorseful. If you caught your wife banging someone else would it be ok if she said sorry hun I was just 'foolish'?I do respect her.. after all this I feel that I am the lucky one... I think some of it is that she did not want to blow up the entire 18 years for this. Not to say that she was not super pissed... and asks me a ton of questions. She knows I am truly sorry... but I think from here on out she will be looking for clues... I asked her if she trusts me and she said yes... It's as if she looks at me and says.... stupid man.... and some days she wants to know why I wanted sex with another person... I just told her it was exciting and I was being foolish... I mean it's not easy being in this spot... at least she did not leave...I think some of it is also that fact that she wanted to 'WIN' over the OW winning... if that makes any sense
Evidence of your minimisation:
1. she didn't want to blow up the entire 18 years for this ( you are making what you did sound insignificant, if she did it to you, would it be so minor?)
2. Not to say she was not super pissed ( one is super pissed when one gets a flat tire, or is late for an appointment because of some other person's incompetence). How do your know your wife is not showing a brave front while you have totally broken her heart, or she looks at you in disbelief because it still hasn't sunk in what you did, she is in denial?)
3. It was exciting and I was being foolish, (really, that is what a teenage son tells his mum when he sneaks a cigarette or beer from the Dad's supply) not when a grown man decides to engage in a relationship outside his 18 year marriage!
4. I mean it is not easy being in this spot (wow you are psychopath, it still is all about you and how you feel, blah blah blah, poor you , the victim, you still have no empathy for your wife)
5. Your wife wanted to 'win' over the OW (FFS (and I do not swear) you are so full of ego and sxxx, it is still all about you, maybe your poor wife wanted to save her marriage for the kids, etc, although I cannot understand why, I hope she eventually kicks you out, you do not deserve her at all.
You are a POS tbh, you have managed to make this all about you, no empathy, no remorse at all for what you have done. Your wife is a saint to stay with you.
If you cannot see that what you have done is even wrong, hurt your wife, etc. then do her a favour and ask for a divorce, she doesn't deserve this at all. :surprise: