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I will start this with a little background on my wife and I. We are married a bit over three years now and have been together for almost 7 years. We have a 2 1/2 year old son and a daughter due in March. I love my wife and son but unfortunately I don't get to spend as much time with them as I would like to. I work a schedule in which I work during the day, at night, and overnight each week and then I try to pick up some overtime when I can. I guess it was about April of this year when I started to get suspicious. My wife used to call me when I was at work at night and talk about her day and ask about mine. Those calls stopped and turned into an occasional text message asking "how's ur day?". To get any info about what she had done was lime pillling teeth. So in April our son walks up to me with my sites phone and asks to play a game. When I opened the phone, there is no password needed, I saw it was already open to a text. The text was from a guy that my wife has known for nearly her whole adult life. It didn't bother me that she was texting him.as I thought they were friends. The message said "show me ur tits" and that was a bit concerning. More concerning however was my wires response of you will have to come over if u want to see them. She went on to say that not only could he see them if he came over bit he would get a "full body massage, wink wink". That was the end of that conversation and I didn't confront her about it. A few days later I decide to snoop in her phone when she was not around. I check text messages and the thread I just discussed was deleted but there was a new conversation between her and this other guy. It starts with her asking if he got the pic she went the other day. His response was just a smiley face. So I check the pictures on her phone and what do I find? A topless photo of her. Now mind you, I have made this request of my wife and been turned down and even called a pig for thinking about it. When we have sex, which is not often, she doesn't even allow mentoring take.her shirt off. But I digress. So now I am really starting to worry. I didn't know how to confront her about it so I just told her I was looking at pics and was curious why that one was there.. she told me she meant to send it to me one night when I was working but must have forgotten. I never brought up the text messages. So as time went by I kept snooping here and there and nothing much came off it. Except she invited him over anytime I worked at night. She has never mentioned any of these invites to me. So about a month ago I.am snooping and find a message from her to him saying how she.missed him last night and had even put her tongue ring in for him. Again I start to cringe thinking Bout this. Again I do nothing. Again this thread gets erased. Then a day or so later there is text messages about how she fan be mad if he has a gf since she is married. The final thing, so far, is she tells me this morning that his girlfried contacted her about the two of them. I don't know for sure but I think she was probing to see if I knew anything or had doubts. I don't know what to do though. I love my son and she is pregnant again. I am afraid that if I confront her I will be blamed and get no cconfession anyway. If I do get her to admit something I know I will never trust her again and our marriage will be done. I don't want to lose my son but at the same time I don't want him to lose his mother. I really don't know what to do. I no some will say what I have is plenty of proof of an affair and others will disagree. I don't have the time or funds to put in a camera or hire a PI. I also now can't get to her phone for more than a few moments, she brings it everywhere with her. Someone please help, I can't take the stress of not knowing but also am afraid to know the truth since I know if I am right my marriage is over.
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The game is up and she is now going underground with her affairs. You need to go and get substantial proof via a PI, or get a inexpensive hidden camera for your house. Set it to turn on nights you think she may have him over. The small cameras can record 8 hours before the battery dies. You can pick them up online for under 100$ Then you have the proof you need to have full custody of the children. Otherwise you are just going to be left with a bag of clothes, child support payments, and weekend visits. I feel bad for you man but get the proof.
 

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The game is up and she is now going underground with her affairs. You need to go and get substantial proof via a PI, or get a inexpensive hidden camera for your house. Set it to turn on nights you think she may have him over. The small cameras can record 8 hours before the battery dies. You can pick them up online for under 100$ Then you have the proof you need to have full custody of the children. Otherwise you are just going to be left with a bag of clothes, child support payments, and weekend visits. I feel bad for you man but get the proof.
I would also DNA the kids you wonder just how long this has been going on especially the new born.
 

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I don't think you need more proof. Only if you are in a fault state try to gather evidence.
Serve her divorce papers ( even if you don't want to divorce) . And start the 180 to detach.(Don't tell her anything until she has the papers in her hand)
And see how it plays out.
 

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I'm so very sorry but she is cheating, physically, emotionally. In everyway.
Show me your tits and she is putting in her tonunge ring........


Confront, telling her your filing for divorce tomorrow morning, when she does admit
insist on no contact with other man(s)

Pull 180

And have new baby DNA done, sorry and WAKE UP
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The game is up and she is now going underground with her affairs. You need to go and get substantial proof via a PI, or get a inexpensive hidden camera for your house. Set it to turn on nights you think she may have him over. The small cameras can record 8 hours before the battery dies. You can pick them up online for under 100$ Then you have the proof you need to have full custody of the children. Otherwise you are just going to be left with a bag of clothes, child support payments, and weekend visits. I feel bad for you man but get the proof.
I know I don't want to be a weekend only dad. Funny thing too is she tells me today the guys girlfriend thinks something is going on between them. She then tells me when he comes over that he only arTs for about an hour and usuallyeaves as soon as my son goes to bed so she can relax. Funny thing is the other day she rexted him and told him to come by around 830 when my son goes to bed around 8 every night. The lies are killing me!
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I know I don't want to be a weekend only dad. Funny thing too is she tells me today the guys girlfriend thinks something is going on between them. She then tells me when he comes over that he only arTs for about an hour and usuallyeaves as soon as my son goes to bed so she can relax. Funny thing is the other day she rexted him and told him to come by around 830 when my son goes to bed around 8 every night. The lies are killing me!
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Look pardner, he's depositing his seed into your pregnant wife, (his child) and you are worried about being a weekend dad???

FFS man, pull yer britches up and and get to packing her things.
 

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I know I don't want to be a weekend only dad. Funny thing too is she tells me today the guys girlfriend thinks something is going on between them. She then tells me when he comes over that he only arTs for about an hour and usuallyeaves as soon as my son goes to bed so she can relax. Funny thing is the other day she rexted him and told him to come by around 830 when my son goes to bed around 8 every night. The lies are killing me!
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you will get 50/50 custody more than likely.
 

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Just go see an attorney monday and know your options don't tell her. Separate finances open an acct. in your name only. Set vars in the house and in her car. Good luck
 

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Tell her you and everyone else knows whats going on. Tell her to move her **** out of your bedroom. Call his girlfriend and tell her what you know, she will tell you much more.

DO NOT LET THESE TWO WALK ALL OVER YOU
 

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Go see an attorney and try to get 50/50 custody, get STD tests and Lear the baby didn't catch anything. Insist on paternity testing. Get yourself into counseling.
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Go see an attorney and try to get 50/50 custody, get STD tests and Lear the baby didn't catch anything. Insist on paternity testing. Get yourself into counseling.
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expose to friends and family especially his gf do it tonight!
 

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Walk away from this family,stop paying all the bills,just walk away.Take all the money from the bank, look for another job and stay out of sight for two to three weeks. I know that you are afraid. I know that you do not want the world that you built to come crashing down, it would be too easy just to go along...BUT....You would be a coward, and your wife would know that you were a coward, and the POS would know you were a coward. Trust me, YOU DO NOT want to go thru life knowing that you had a chance to do the right thing and you did not because of FEAR! I was there, I know, I loved her too much and I did the wrong thing.
You are going to put you first! Go to the internet and look up divorce laws in you state, print up divorce papers and after three weeks of no contact, call you wife,set up a meeting and tell her its time to divorce. Good luck and be STRONG! Keep us updated on whats going on.
 

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Your wife is having an affair I would talk to a lawyer and get all my ducks in a row before I dropped the bomb on her. You might want to hide some spare cash also.
 

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This is harsh but pregnancy may not be yours. A child born into the marriage by your wife due to adultery is still considered yours legally. You need to be prepared for this eventuality. If you dont, you could be stuck raising another man's child for 18 to 22 years. That would suck big time.

She's dued in March. See a lawyer now. File for divorce. After the baby is born, do a paternity test. Or, you could have an in-vitro paternity test done now (but it will be more expensive).

You can always change your mind about the divorce later after the baby is born.

Also in the meantime, cancel all joint bank accounts, credit cards, loans/debts, etc. Update your beneficiary for your life insurance, pension, etc.

Take a protective position now. You're in too new of a marriage for your wife to be scr3wing another man. And when she has a young toddler and pregnant. Something is seriously not right here.
 
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