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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My wife and I got into a high equity but precarious situation a year ago when we chose to be house poor together.

She up and left after 'falling in love' with her coworker 2 months ago. Now she is hyper-focused on getting her own apartment at the expense of ruining everything.

I'm going to be homeless soon, it's like we're heading towards a cliff that we both never wanted to Hoover and she just ignores me and doesn't care.

I can count on one hand how many times we've actually conversed in the last 8 weeks, and every time it is negative and worse-case scenario from her...

No effort whatsoever to treat me like a human being and at the very least honor the time and effort we've spent in the last 12 years.

I came from poverty and I've spent my entire adlt life meeting our goals and making her happy and now my worst nightmare is coming true that I'm going to be this loser in his 30's.

I feel like there is no hope right now. She has devastated me emotionally and now she is ruining me financially. Her strategy is to 'find a billionaire'. What am I left with here? Nothing.

If you're interested the original story is here.
 

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I am sorry you find yourself in this state.

I hope you have a good lawyer to protect you financially. I hope he or she is a real shark
 

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Sudden404, I'm sorry that you have so much pain to deal with. No doubt, you can get through this. I'm glad that you did not take your life. Be your own best friend. Do what is best for you. From your posts, it appears that you devoted so much love, effort, and time to a woman that took it for granted. You deserve to be happy. I agree with Toffer that you should consider retaining a lawyer, or at the very least talking with one to know more about your rights and options. I wish you the best in getting through this trial in your life.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thanks guys - really low point last night for me - just keep swinging from sadness to anger and the lows are always getting lower.
 

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Hey Sudden404 I went through the depression and was recently going through it. But let me say something, its not the end of the world.

I read your story and my impression is that you have a low esteem of yourself. That is your problem, not really your wife. You said you came from poverty but was able to work and meet your goals. That is great isn't it? But you fear that you are going to be a loser in his 30's once your wife leaves? Of course not. You'll be able to get it back.

I came from wealth and after a few bad business decisions lost it all when I turned 40! I don't have to be a psychologist to understand why my wife left me. She had security, and I just threw that away for her. She put up with it though for 3 years and during that time it wasn't very good. And when she told me she was leaving, I did all the things you did...letters, talks, counseling, etc. Guess what? She still left anyway! Just like your wife she was checked out even before she told me told she wanted to leave and nothing I said or did would make her change her mind. In fact, everything I did just pushed her further away like yours.

So I say, be a man, suck it up and work on your good old self and things will go your way. Its tough to fail if you are dedicated. Have a plan and don't dwell on the past. All that stuff is finished, there's no where to go but forward.

I'll tell you something. I got a depression relapse just about a month ago. Thought about the past again, the marriage, but looked at myself in the mirror and said "get back with the program" and I did. But this time I tried to accelerate a little, worked out more, ate better, dressed better, and forced myself to just smile a lot more. You know what happened? I found myself being more happy by forcing myself to be happy.

And people pick up on these things. It wasn't long before a female acquaintance and I shared a drink. I forgot how charming I could be if I was really myself. I was relaxed. She was surely charmed because she invited me back to her place. And I went and it lead to the best darned sex I've had in five years. What an intense experience. She was a hundred times better than my wife! Do you know how much that can do to a someone's ego? I'm even more now determined to be the best that I can be. I feel much better and people are noticing it. The confidence is coming back.

You have it in you. Don't give up.
 
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