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We've been through a lot over 20 years of marraige but this is the worst. I have been attacked by my H more then once. This time was last week and the police got involved. He was arrested and has to see a judge on Tuesday. I have a couple of broken bones and a lot of bumps, bruises and cuts. My 15 year old Daughter and I do not want him home. He is staying at a friends and signed up for an outpatient rehab after I threatened him that he could not come home if he didn't. We have a house and I am disabled and on a very low income. I don't know what to do. I can't afford to live alone and my Family is not willing to get involved because they suck. I'm alone with my Daughter and I'm scared out of my mind. I don't love him or want him but I'm afraid to be alone and I don't know what to do next. I am going to see the judge so that I can tell him/her what's happened but I don't know if I should keep him out if I even can do that? I'm broke, scared and on my own. Any advice would be appreciated.
 

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You need to get in contact with a local chapter of something like "citizens against spouse abuse." They can help and guide through this.
 

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Well you need to start divorce proceedings and legal steps so he can never come near you or your daughter ever again.

Don't allow him back in the house for anything.

Look would you rather be beaten or have your fear of being alone, you need to protect your daughter from him, you will cope, there should be all sorts of help, you need to find them.

There should be others along soon that can offer much more valuable information on what to do.
 

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You are NOT alone, you have your daughter. And you need to think about HER as well as yourself.

Your H is a violent man (don't care why: drinking, drugs, doesn't get his way) and by staying in this marriage with him in the house, YOU ARE TELLING YOUR DAUGHTER WITHOUT WORDS that this is the way a marriage works. She will be involved with abusive boyfriends/husbands HER WHOLE LIFE if YOU don't put an end to the cycle now. LOVE YOUR DAUGHTER and CARE ABOUT HER *MORE* than you care about your personal fears!

Call a women's abuse/crisis hotline. Call them TODAY. Get some help with counseling for YOURSELF and FOR YOUR DAUGHTER.

They will also direct you to FREE/LOW-COST legal advice on keeping your husband OUT OF YOUR HOME since you and your daughter don't want him there and he has beaten you up.

They will also direct you towards programs that can help you financially.

So GET BUSY, GET ON THE PHONE, start making some positive changes in your life TODAY.

And come Tuesday, you tell the judge EVERYTHING! All the history of the last 20 years including the beating. YOU deserve to have the truth told. You deserve to have the LAW on YOUR SIDE. And your daughter deserves to have you salvage what little you can of her childhood from your incredibly screwed-up husband.
 

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Sorry for your situation. Your finances will make it very hard but you have to find a way to be rid of this man. If not for yourself, do it for your daughter. You don't want her repeating your history. It seems counter-intuitive but happens far more often than you would think. Kids tend to repeat many of the things they see when growing up.

Cut him out of your life. I know this sounds simplistic and you'll have 1,000 valid reasons for how you can't do it. You can. It will require great sacrifice but you will find a way. If he's breaking bones now, what do you think might happen next time? Poverty is a lot better than death. There are organizations to help people like you. You just have to believe that you deserve help. You do. No one, man or woman should be in physical danger from a spouse.

Good luck in your stuggle.
 

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First of all, I am so sorry you went through this, I really feel for you. I am not sure how it is in the U.S. but in some provinces in Canada, the police will actually press charges on the spouse who assaults their partner. He will have a record, and may even spend time in jail. Or, I would recomend you press charges, he cannot be allowed to treat women this way, and believe me, he will treat others the same way.

Can you get yourself to a Women's Shelter? start with the internet, and do a search for your area. If you don't have any money, they can provide you with a cab or bus money to get you there. Now, you say you are financially strapped, the Shelter can help get you set up financially, get you on social aid, I know it's not great, but at least you are away from your spouse and his harmful ways.
 

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Well you need to start divorce proceedings and legal steps so he can never come near you or your daughter ever again.

Don't allow him back in the house for anything.

Look would you rather be beaten or have your fear of being alone, you need to protect your daughter from him, you will cope, there should be all sorts of help, you need to find them.

There should be others along soon that can offer much more valuable information on what to do.
:iagree:

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Physical attacks only get worse with time. I'm sure yours started as just a slap and then became full on beatings. Just imagine what they're going to evolve into. You don't wanna be alone? Find someone. Just not HIM!
 
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