[tamii]

I think my marriage is over ...

My wife has not been working for the last 2 years. I give her an allowance every month. A couple of months ago she revealed that she has been using some of that money to pay for her brother's babysitter because he is in financial stress.

My parents came to visit recently. She had a temper tantrum and told me my parents were treating her like a slave as she had to work overtime with the household chores.

I told her, well, I resent the fact that I need to support your brother but I don't make a big fuss about it. She blew up when I said that.

I don't really think I want to forgive her for being so impatient with my family while I've been so generous (albeit resentfully) to her (with her not working) and her family.

Neither do I think she'll forgive me for pointing out that I am effectively supporting both her and her family ... even though it's the truth.

 

[Toffer]

Is there a specific question here?

Is this issue really worth walking away from your marriage?

Do you love your wife?

 

[MSC71]

That is all it takes to end your marriage?

 

[SadSamIAm]

You said, "My wife has not been working for the last 2 years. I give her an allowance every month."

1) Why isn't she working? Do you have kids? Maybe there is a good reason why she isn't working and if you have younger kids, my guess is that she is working, just not getting paid?

2) If I told my wife I was "giving her an allowance", she wouldn't feel like a partner. My wife is a SAHM and has full access to all family funds.

I agree that without more information, it is difficult to see how your marriage can end over something this insignificant.

 

[Dubya]

Take a deep breath. Go give your wife a hug. Learn about boundaries. Work out your problems.