How could anyone bring this out into the light of day when there ARE children and they would not eventually be exposed to it? And not by just anyone, but their FATHER. I have five, still innocent children, that I refuse to let be exposed to this for as long as I can. The fact that the man I chose to marry and have children with LIED to me BEFORE we got married is NOT my fault. He lied and hid it well KNOWING that I DO find it morally reprehensible. The 'porn', and his use of it would be the reason for the damage to our marriage, not because I don't accept something I've ALWAYS been against. I would have no problem leaving him to let him have his 'stuff' all to himself, but with the children, I cannot bear to tear their world in two. I admit it is a balancing act staying married and keeping the kids safe. I have been supportive in helping him to overcome this and offered to go to counseling with him (or he can go alone) but he INSISTS it 's no problem and he can stop anytime...and then, he obviously doesn't.
As for the sex...the only complaint would be he is usually too tired and can go weeks without it because, well, let's face it, he has 'Other Options'...So good luck to anyone trying to convince me this is 'Normal'. It would be like trying to convince me there isn't a God. BTW, if this was a casual peak at women's naked body's because they are beautiful, then this would be very different, but the stuff I found WAS VULGAR and demeaning to me as a woman. How can he look at me or our daughter's in a respectable way after indulging in watching group sex and women having sex with machines? And getting off on it too? I also found some kind of device that has what looks like a small probe and a long wire attached to some sort of battery powered thing with a button on it..no idea what that is. Why is this better than being with me? His always faithful, supportive, loving wife..
I'm just so sad and don't know what to do and I guess I asked the original question about the where and how because I can't deal with this anymore...
If your husband knew you felt like this before marriage, he shouldn't have agreed to marry you. That you seriously are questioning how your husband looks at your DAUGHTER based off his viewing of pretty common porn is alarming.
The big mistake he made was marrying a woman who reacts this way to his watching porn. He should have never even put himself in the position of having to lie about something he's been doing since he was 12. He'd have been better off partnering with a woman who's ideas, and thoughts, on the matter weren't nearly as extreme as yours.