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Well elegirl,
If it were that simple,then we wouldn't even behaving this discussion.
I have a cousin who years ago posed nude for a local softcore " skin " magazine. Of course everyone in our family expressed shock [ except me. I saw the pics and they were tastefully done]. She was young and very beautiful , but most of all her father was affluent and she was a university grad.
She wasn't looking for money,nor was she abused. She did it for the fun.
A lot of pornstars do drugs , have been abused as kids and have STD's. But so too a lot of rock musicians, rappers , and almost anybody in show business.
I work in the fashion industry.
At one time I used to vet girls for photo shoots as models for magazines and billboard ads etc.
I was amazed at how many of these these girls would offer themselves to me for sex , because they wanted to get their face on a billboard or magazine cover. More than 90%. I was married,I always refused and somehow a rumour was started that I was gay.

I left that aspect of the business.
But it gave me a better understanding of how complex humans are, and why porn is a billion dollar business.
Your cousin... softcore is, in my mind, not really born. Nude pictures of people, beautiful or otherwise is not really porn... not the porn I think we are discussing here anyway.

As for women (and men) who will trade sexual favors to get their pictures in whatever media they are interested in… I still think it takes a person who has some issues to see their own sexuality as a bargaining chip or a way to pay for access.

Yes a lot of rock musicians, rappers, and a lot of people in show business have issues with prior abuse, drug use, etc... but they are not doing sex acts for the public. There is a difference. Each person experiences the damage from these things differently. Most do not end up thinking that their best or only chance to earn a good living is to engage in video's sex acts so that people they don't know can jack off them. There's a difference between being a rock start and a porn star.

Most men on this forum (and in the population) would not date and certainly not marry the very women they get off on in porn. From my conversations with men and threads on this forum, most men look down on these women.

My major concern is about the sex-slavery industry that uses girls/women and boys/men who have no choice in what they are doing. Their very lives are in danger if they refuse to engage in the sex acts.
 

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I think thats a fair assessment, though viewers that look down on actors/actresses would probably look down on anyone that they felt were inferior to them.

a rating system would be an awesome idea.
The problem with a rating system is that those who are using sex slaves are not going to admit it and put that rating on their porn.

Most men I have ever discussed porn with say that they would never date (in a serious relationship) or marry any women who is a porn 'actress'. I am of the impression that most men look down on them.
 

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I also wonder how a husband would react to their wife having a regular viewing habit of porn involving really well built men.
 

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no. they dont do it because its RAPE. And you can go to jail for a while for doing it. Where one might well get to experience the pleasure of being ravished that you so advocate.
:scratchhead::scratchhead:

It's not rape unless the woman said no :rolleyes:. Holy crap. My husband 'ravishes' my body all the time. It's awesome and I like a good pounding. It's not rape. Just because sex can be rough and hard and ravishing, doesn't mean it's rape.
 
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Ravish also means to give great delight to; or to enrapture.

ravishing (Adjective)
enchanting, beautiful, lovely, stunning (informal), charming, entrancing, gorgeous, dazzling, delightful, radiant, drop-dead (slang), bewitching ----She looked ravishing.

When my husband says he wants to ravish my body, I don't scream rape. :rolleyes:
 
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The problem with a rating system is that those who are using sex slaves are not going to admit it and put that rating on their porn.

Most men I have ever discussed porn with say that they would never date (in a serious relationship) or marry any women who is a porn 'actress'. I am of the impression that most men look down on them.
on the contrary do you ever discuss with women, whether they would marry or seriously date a male porn actor? i think most women wouldnt either. and its not to with gender bias, its just most people cant handle their mate screwing other people.


I also wonder how a husband would react to their wife having a regular viewing habit of porn involving really well built men.
Its been done i think, search it out. I take the same stand as always, I wouldnt be bothered unless she was watching it instead of doing me.
 

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I also wonder how a husband would react to their wife having a regular viewing habit of porn involving really well built men.

When I was in the Army, some of the girls put up posters of men posing in the nude. They caught h3ll from the males in our units. The men were very upset that the women were being so disgusting.

When I was stationed in the pentagon we had a sgt in our office that had the female cheese cake pages from the Army magazine under the glass of his desk and framed on his wall. They were tasteful pictures of women wearing lingerie in sexy poses.

Once a year they did a page of a nice looking, fully clothed guy for the female soldiers… not guys in sexy cloths. Well one time they had a popular football player in a sweat shirt that was torn so that his mid-section showed… his belly button and some stomach hair. So I framed it and hung it on the wall by my desk. I really thought nothing of it. I was just poking fun at the sgt who was my friend.

Well no one, male or female, ever complained about all the cheese cake photos the sgt had in his office. But my one picture of a fully clothed football player with a bit of his stomach showing caused an uproar …. Among the men in the Pentagon’s Army War Department. I had enlisted men and officers complaining about the pornographic picture of a man I had over my desk. They made these complains to my face and to Army personnel.

Nothing ever happened to me because I just had to take the complainer to the sgt’s office. They all were very much aware of the sgt’s office because he’d had those photos of scantily dressed women up there for years. At least my photo was of a guy with only his belly showing.
 

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Thats a nasty double standard.



:scratchhead::scratchhead:

It's not rape unless the woman said no :rolleyes:. Holy crap. My husband 'ravishes' my body all the time. It's awesome and I like a good pounding. It's not rape. Just because sex can be rough and hard and ravishing, doesn't mean it's rape.
The law might disagree with you on that varying by state.

The word you mean is something other then ravish then because when I look up the meaning of ravish, it definitively states rape in the sexual context.
 

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on the contrary do you ever discuss with women, whether they would marry or seriously date a male porn actor? i think most women wouldnt either. and its not to with gender bias, its just most people cant handle their mate screwing other people.
Ah, but this does not apply to most of the women because most of the women are not watching porn on a normal basis. Most women are not consumers of porn, so their view of the men who are 'actors' in porn are not hypocritical.
 

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Ah, but this does not apply to most of the women because most of the women are not watching porn on a normal basis. Most women are not consumers of porn, so their view of the men who are 'actors' in porn are not hypocritical.
....so how do you know it doesnt apply to women if you dont ask them?.....

Its biased not to really.
 

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....so how do you know it doesnt apply to women if you dont ask them?.....

Its biased not to really.
If a woman views porn regularly and she looks down on the people in the porn industry, then she is hypocritical.

However, most things I have read say that most women do not veiw porn. If a woman who does not view porn looks down on those who are in the porn industry she is not hypocritical because she is not invovled in viewing porn and is not a consumer of porn.
 

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Discussion Starter · #133 ·
Yes, but when my husband says, "I want to ravish your body", I know he won't rape me :rolleyes:.
How 'Ravish and Rape' are being compared here, I have no idea....My H Ravishing me back in the day: AWESOME! Now: Painful. Although I wouldn't consider it Ravish or Rape. Just self centered.
I know how my husbands body works with my own, and I should know, we've been intimate for almost 14 years. The length of time and force it takes for 'HIM' to climax has only increased DRAMATICALLY in the last few years! And that's for the handful of times in a month already. Why? Because life is boring? Is it because he's been with the same old person for too long?? Am I not DARING enough?? Too PRUDISH??
UH YEAH, GARBAGE: I KNOW that a loving marriage GROWS and only gets better with time when both H and W are LOVING and SENSITIVE to each others needs. My H and I, ARE NOT on the same page here. There is NO LACK of communication here either because I've been clear about how it feels to me, what I like, asked what HE likes, ect. So he's not in the dark about this.
As for the posters who say, 'DIVORCE', Thank You, NOTED. Divorce is a little more complicated than that (especially with kd's)
(FYC: I would NEVER suggest a 'divorce' to a complete stranger on a post in a forum. WTH?)
Separation is more likely if conditions don't improve. Counseling? Always an option, if he ever decides to participate.
 

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The length of time and force it takes for 'HIM' to climax has only increased DRAMATICALLY in the last few years!
How old is he? Is he healthy and fit? Does he take medication for something? How is his blood pressure? An increase in time to reach orgasm can mean a lot of different things. Maybe a visit to the doctor is in order?

I KNOW that a loving marriage GROWS and only gets better with time
But as far as sex goes things aren't always that clear cut. When people say sex gets better it is usually because people get to know each other's bodies and tastes and dislikes. But nothing really beats the excitement of novelty.

That's why many couples try role-playing and acting out some daredevil fantasies.

As for the posters who say, 'DIVORCE', Thank You, NOTED. Divorce is a little more complicated than that (especially with kd's)
Yes, that was basically the reaction i was expecting here... So, this issue won't lead you to divorce him but just annoys the hell out of you. It's a really hard situation. You won't budge on your demand that he stops doing it and he won't stop it (6th time... hopeless). What now? It's going to be complicated. You can continue to bust his balls over it whenever you find the stuff and this will go on forever.

You seem to have taken a look at the mags and you found it disgusting. So i guess that rules out fooling around with the notions and things done in them, is that correct?
 

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Discussion Starter · #135 · (Edited)
Costa200 says, "You seem to have taken a look at the mags and you found it disgusting. So i guess that rules out fooling around with the notions and things done in them, is that correct?"[/QUOTE]

Hmmmm.....sex with a robotic contraption? No thank you. Group sex? Nahh. Another woman? Um..Not gay, or bi or curious, so, I think I'll pass.
 

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I also wonder how a husband would react to their wife having a regular viewing habit of porn involving really well built men.
Very well-built men stare out at women from billboards along roads and on the subway (although under the Pentagon there are mostly ads for IT systems and fueling planes :)), in magazines and newspapers, on sites and in books... Viewing them in acts that these men almost certainly inevitably do isn't at all outlandish.
 

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Hmmmm.....sex with a robotic contraption? No thank you. Group sex? Nahh. Another woman? Um..Not gay, or bi or curious, so, I think I'll pass.
I have no idea exactly what you saw there. That weird stuff will certainly be hard to do. Were there any other more normal stuff?
 

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I have no idea exactly what you saw there. That weird stuff will certainly be hard to do. Were there any other more normal stuff?
Do a google search on "porn sex with machines" . You'll see what she's talking about. This thread has introduced me to yet another bizare level of human sexuality....or whatever that's called.
 

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Very well-built men stare out at women from billboards along roads and on the subway (although under the Pentagon there are mostly ads for IT systems and fueling planes :)), in magazines and newspapers, on sites and in books... Viewing them in acts that these men almost certainly inevitably do isn't at all outlandish.
A well built guy on billboards is very different for a man experiencing what many women do....

Do find out that your spouse is masterbating in secret on a regular bases to images of porn and live porn online.

How would you react that that were just about the only sex your wife wanted... masterbation while she watches other men get it on?

Your bringing up billboards completely minimizes my point. I'm sure you were aware of that when you posted it.
 

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:scratchhead::scratchhead:

It's not rape unless the woman said no :rolleyes:. Holy crap. My husband 'ravishes' my body all the time. It's awesome and I like a good pounding. It's not rape. Just because sex can be rough and hard and ravishing, doesn't mean it's rape.
:iagree::iagree: I love me some jackrabbit sex with Mr. FYD.

As for Rainy, I feel very disturbed by the kind of porn her husband is into. I am also sad that porn is causing problems in her bedroom and the fact that her husband feels the need to lie about his porn addiction.

I am one of the few women who enjoy porn and relatively frequent masturbation. I have been touching myself since age 4 and I had my first taste of porn at age 12. It does not affect our marriage because our sex life is amazing and the porn I watch is not hardcore or weird at all. (Lesbian and hetero cunnlilingus)

I would never choose porn over my husband. My husband draws the line at sex toys because he feels jealous when I use those. "Why would you need a vibrator? You have me! I'M your sex toy!" :rofl: The hubby is clearly insecure, so I do not buy sex toys out of respect for him.

Porn is just a smokescreen; the real issues are addiction and being dishonest. Unless Rainy's husband is willing to examine and correct his behavior, I don't see the marriage improving.
 
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