my fiance and i were best friends for quite a while before we even began a relationship. We always liked each other, and we had other relationships but one thing was always holding me back from dating him. He was in a long term relationship with a girl who cheated on him all the time, and they had a child when they were still in highschool. they got married young i guess to do the "right thing". He still always talked so highly of the kids mother and i knew he wasn't over her. Some time has passed now and we're engaged and he swears that he thought he loved her because she was all he knew but hes happy with me now. I find this hard to believe and i feel like i have to compete with her, even though he doesn't bring her up at all. I like the kid and care for her but i know i will not love her like i would love my own and he knows this. the girl is 8 now and we get along great, and she likes me but I always had the vision of getting married and sharing a first child but now i know i won't get that with him. I love him to death, i really do, but i find myself always angry and bitter towards him. I find myself wishing that if he was a smarter teen, i wouldn't have to deal with this, and i feel horrible for feeling like that. I really don't want to break up with him but i feel like theres a void between us because im always thinking about how i wasn't able to give him his first child. I hate feeling like i may not be living up to how 'good" his ex was, even though now he always argues with her..which i think is a way to convince himself he doesn't care about her anymore. i really don't know what to do with this because i do see myself being with him and marrying him, but this one thing is bothering me so much... any advice?