You need leave. You didn't follow through on what you said, there fore in his mind he can continue on with whatever. And for him to tell you he will tell you what you need to change and if you don't he will leave is BS. Go ahead and leave, you told him if he did it again you would. As of right now you come across as a liar to him, and maybe even to yourself.Husband was a drug addict when we first started dating, found this out 7 months into the relationship. Went to rehab and was clean for 6 years. This past October he said he needed a release, some fun in his life, so he started to use again. I told him that this mad me really upset, told him I wasn't proud of him being clean 6 years and even told him I would leave him if he did it again. Well since October he has done it 4 times and I haven't kept my promise in leaving. He told me that he was going to get better, lose weight and then give ME an ultimatum on what he wants me to change and if I don't change then he will leave me. He uses the excuse that he is miserable in life, hates his life, is overweight as an excuse to use. I'm not sure what to do anymore.