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A few issues. Porn, Trany-porn, feeling husband is a lazy lover.

I think that porn in excess can be a problem. I think that porn can be overstimulating and dehumanizing. But I also think that there is porn and then there is porn. about 1/4 of today's advertising would have been considered porn 100 years ago. So "porn" may have shifting boundaries.

Trany-Porn is "unusual." But then some who are into porn are into the "unusual." Not my thing, but then again neither are ropes and whips. Other people are into latex and leather. Again, not my thing, but doesn't make it "criminal or wrong." If the wife is concerned about what it means, have her ask her husband in a way that is non-judgmental and doesn't shame him. The goal is for him to be able to share his deepest sexual thought fantasy without shame or guilt. If she can do that, then he will never hide parts of his sexuality from her.

Husband as a lazy lover. Wow. To even say the words, makes me cringe. If she can think this, then she has probably communicated the horrible message to him in at least a non-verbal way. Talk about a way to turn a guy off to making love. If he was a poor lover, my advice is to teach him what you need/want or have both of you go to a sex therapist who will provide the two of you with educational materials. (If the sex therapist is anything like the one that saved my marriage, it will involve "instructional sex videos" that my wife insisted were "porn." So I guess we have come full circle.

Good luck OP
 

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I say, put him in chastity, make him wear a maid uniform, and HE becomes your new maid, and does all the housework from now on.

He'll love it! And you get to sit back, relax, and watch.

Oh yes, he also should be made to massage your feet, give you oral sex on command, and do all the cooking.

YOU be in control of his orgasms, and he stays locked up until YOU decide he gets release.

Hey, he'll be in his glory, and you'll be worshipped.

Win- Win
 

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Pornography has no place in a marriage... ever.

The only way to get rid of pornography is to eliminate masturbation.

The only way to eliminate masturbation is to agree to radical honesty whereby neither of you are allowed to masturbate without the other's permission first. If he asks for permission, you decline permission and make love to him instead.

Pornography will literally rob men of their drive and desire since it is all fantasy.
Speak for yourself church lady!
@Anon Pink that one completely went over your head. In trans porn where men are sissified and made to wear female cloths, this fetish is encouraged by eliminating all forms of traditional masturbation. The male should never touch his penis again, and instead reroute all his stimulation towards prostate play. @Legend here was the ONLY ONE giving advice that would rekindle some serious freaking kinky sparks this relationship but just left out a few details, that is all.
 

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@Anon Pink that one completely went over your head. In trans porn where men are sissified and made to wear female cloths, this fetish is encouraged by eliminating all forms of traditional masturbation. The male should never touch his penis again, and instead reroute all his stimulation towards prostate play. @Legend here was the ONLY ONE giving advice that would rekindle some serious freaking kinky sparks this relationship but just left out a few details, that is all.
Perhaps the advice given by @Legend for neither party to masturbate without the express written consent of the other party would apply in certain "male submissive fetish" scenarios but not in a typical healthy marriage between two normal individuals.
 

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it sounds like he is at least a cross dresser, and may be becoming transgender/bisexual. If he were still 100% hetero, the sex with you would not have died down.

so, if this is not your cup of tea....it does not bode will for your marriage or sex life.

If you are kinky...buy him some sexy things and help to dress him up and "feminize" him. It is a big fetish thing with these sort of men. Especially "forced" feminization. some like the humiliation aspect too, so dress him up, and invite your girlfriend(s) over to make fun of him dressed up.

by supporting his crossdressing, you may find his hetero sex interest returns again too.
 

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Enter into it with him. See what his reaction is. Go with it and see if it changes or reinforces his behaviour.
I think a step before that, talk about it! Nothing causes a gap between two people to get bigger than not communicating. But, you have to plan what you want to say. You have to keep a positive slant on it at all times or he will get defensive, hurt, and shut down forever.

After that, continue the conversation with this: Offer to watch the porn together. While it's going, ask him what it is he likes about it, would he like you to do this or that to him, etc. With the right toy you can be everything he likes in the movie if you want. Go from there.

Watching the porn is not the problem, it is a symptom of something else.
 

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Now, I have always been aware of the fact that he has a panty fetish. He has always liked me to wear certain types of panties and sometimes would like to smell my worn panties. He also buys used panties online.
Nothing wrong with him wanting to smell his woman but getting them online? WTF? The rest ain't right, either.
 
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